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初級練習問題の添削

 

練習問題 21 (9 Feb 03) (23 May 03) (4 March 04) (1 July 04) (12 April 05) (30 May 05)

(10 Aug 05) (15 March 06) (11 Nov 06) (1 Dec 06) (12 Dec 06) (15 April 07) (26 Aug 07) (8 Nov 07) (5 Feb 08) (20 June 08) (1 July 08) (13 July 08)

(8 July 09) (12 Oct 09) (29 Sept 13) (17 Dec 13)

 

(19 Jan 10) (5 Apr 10) (17 March 12) (9 June 12) (13 Sept 13)

 

練習問題 22 (9 Feb 03) (24 June 03) (11 March 04) (1 July 04) (12 April 05)

               (10 Aug 05) (16 March 06) (11 Nov 06) (3 Dec 06) (15 April 07) (26 Aug07)

                            (9 Nov 07) (6 Feb 08) (21 June 08) (8 July 09) (13 Oct 09)

 

                            (20 Jan 10) (10 Apr 10) (17 March 12) (5 Sept 13) (17 Dec 13)

 

練習問題 23 (14 Feb 03) (24 June 03) (11 March 04) (1 July 04) (12 April 05)

               (10 Aug 05) (11 Nov06) (22 Nov 06) (4 Dec 06) (16 April 07) (27 Aug 07)

                            (10 Nov 07) (7 Feb 08) (23 June 08) (12 July 09) (12 July 09) (13 Oct 09)

 

                            (20 Jan 10) (13 Apr 10) (17 March 12) (7 Sept 13) (18 Dec 13)

 

練習問題 24 (9 Feb 03) (8 Aug 03) (19 March 04) (1 July 04) (12 April 05)

               (10 Aug 05) (25 March 07) (11 Nov 06) (5 Dec 06) (16 April 07) (27 Aug 07)

        (8 Feb 08) (21 July 08) (12 July 09) (26 Oct 09) (22 Jan 10) (18 Apr 10)

                            (27 March 12) (14 Sept 13) (16 Oct 13) (18 Dec 13)

 

練習問題 25 (14 Feb 03) (19 March 04) (2 July 04) (12 April 05) (10 Aug 05)

(29 March 06) (11 Nov 06) (18 Nov 06) (6 Dec 06) (17 April 07)

(28 Aug 07) (14 Nov 07) (9 Feb 08) (6 Aug 08) (12 July 09) (3 Nov 09)

(22 Jan 10) (22 Apr 10) (27 March12) (15 Sept 13) (27 Oct 13)

 

(21 Dec 13)

 

練習問題 21

 

デパートの多くがことしは二日から店を開けた。スーパーマーケットは元日も休まず営業をするところが珍しくなくなった。しかし、新聞の投書欄に「お正月なのに子どもたちと家でゆっくり過ごす時間がなくなった」と、激しい商戦を嘆く、スーパーで働くパートタイマーのお母さんからの声が載っていた。

 

読者からの投稿 27(owl, 17 December 13

 

This year, many department stores started operations on January 2nd. Nowadays, it is not unusual that supermarkets do business even on New Year's Day. However, in the correspondence column of a newspaper, I read a letter from a mother working part-time at a supermarket. In it, she lamented that she didn't have relaxing time to spend with her children even though it was the New Year holidays.

 

添削

 

This year, many department stores started their business operations on January 2nd. Nowadays, it is not unusual that supermarkets do business even on New Year's Day. However, in the correspondence column of a newspaper, I read a letter from a mother working part-time at a supermarket. In it, sShe lamented that she didn't have relaxing time to  spend with her children even during though it was the New Year holidays.

 

コメント

 

内容のすべてがわかります。

 

添削後の文章

 

This year, many department stores started their business on January 2nd. Nowadays, it is not unusual that supermarkets do business even on New Year's Day. However, in the correspondence column of a newspaper, I read a letter from a mother working part-time at a supermarket. She lamented that she didn't have time to spend with her children even during  New Year holidays.

 

 

読者からの投稿 26(sasuke, 29 September 13

 

Most department stores opened up on January 2 this year. Opening supermarkets on New Year's Day became usual scenes. An opinion from a mother working for a supermarket as a part time worker who cries over the aggressive competition was in a newspaper; "Even on New Year's Day, I lost the time to relax and spend with my children."

 

添削

 

Most department stores opened up on January 2 this year. Opening supermarkets on New Year's Day became usual scenes nowadays. However, Aan opinion from a mother working at for a supermarket as a part time worker who cries complained over the aggressive competition was in a newspaper saying;, "Even on New Year's Day, I worked and could not lost the time to relax and spend with my children."

 

コメント

 

内容のすべてがわかります。

 

添削後の文章

 

Most department stores opened on January 2 this year. Opening supermarkets on New Year's Day became usual scenes nowadays. However, an opinion from a mother working at  a supermarket as a part time worker complained over the aggressive competition in a newspaper saying, "Even on New Year's Day, I worked and could not relax and spend with my children."

 

 

読者からの投稿 25(文月、13 September 13

 

This year many department stores started business from January 2nd. Now it is not rare that supermarkets are on business on New Year's Day. I have read a letter from a mother, who is working at part time job at a supermarket, in the readers' correspondence column of the newspaper. In the letter, she complained that because of a hot sales battle, she could not spend enough time with her children at home on New Year's holiday, when many japanese people enjoy themselves with their family.

 

添削

 

This year, many department stores started business on from January 2nd. Now it is not rare to see that supermarkets are on business on New Year's Day. I have read a letter from a mother, who is working at part- time1 job at a supermarket, in the readers' correspondence column of a the newspaper. In the letter, she complained that because of tough competition a hot sales battle, she could not take time off to spend enough time with her children at home on during New Year's holidays, when many jJapanese people enjoyed themselves with their familyies.

 

コメント

 

内容のすべてがわかります。

 

1.       Working full-time, working part-timeという言い方があります。ここでfull-time, part-timeは副詞の役割をしています。

 

添削後の文章

 

This year, many department stores started business on January 2nd. Now it is not rare to see that supermarkets are on business on New Year's Day. I have read a letter from a mother, who is working part- time at a supermarket, in the readers' column of a newspaper. In the letter, she complained that because of tough competition, she could not take time off to spend enough time with her children at home during New Year's holidays when many Japanese people enjoyed themselves with their families.

 

 

読者からの投稿 24(OKEN, 9 June 12

 

This year, many department stores opened from January 2. It has been common that some supermarkets operate without taking holidays even on January 1. However, I found some feedbacks presented by mothers working in a part time at supermarkets in a letters column of newspapers. The feedbacks suggested their lamenting to frantic selling and one of them said “I can not have much time with my children at home even on New Years’s Day.”.

 

添削

 

This year, many department stores started business on opened from January 2.1 It has been common that some supermarkets operate without taking holidays even on January 1. However, I found a comment2 some feedbacks presented by a mothers working in a part -time at a supermarkets in the a letters from readers column of a newspapers. The feedbacks mother suggested their lamenting lamented to frantic competition among supermarkets selling and one of them said saying, “I can not have much time with my children at home even on New Years’s Day.”.

 

コメント

 

内容のすべてがわかります。

 

1.       時間の期間を示すときにはfrom Monday to Fridayのようにfrom A to Bという形をとるのが普通なのでfromだけですと不安定です。opened on January 1としてもよいですが、ではJanuary 2は開いたのか、という質問もでるので、添削のようにしました。startedですから、1日以降も開けている、ということがふくまれます。

 

2.       ここでは日本文の通りに一人のお母さんがよいでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

This year, many department stores started business on. It has been common that some supermarkets operate without taking holidays even on January 1. However, I found a comment by a mother working part-time at a supermarket in the letters from readers column of a newspaper. The mother lamented frantic competition among supermarkets saying, “I can not have much time with my children at home even on New Year’s Day.”

 

 

読者からの投稿 23(Valley winds, 17 March 12

 

Many department stores opened from January 2 this year. Many of Supermarkets are open on New Year’s Day. Regarding this, on a newspaper’s opinion column there were some comments from some mothers working part-time at supermarkets, who complained marketing battle, saying that they couldn’t spend time with their children at home on New Year’s Day.

 

添削

 

Many department stores opened from January 2 this year. Many of Ssupermarkets were1 are open even on New Year’s Day. Regarding this trend, on a newspaper’s opinion column there were was a some comments from some a mothers2 working part-time at a supermarkets on a newspaper’s opinion column,. Who She complained marketing battle, saying that she they couldn’t spend time with her their children at home on New Year’s Day.

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       最初の文に合わせてここも過去形でよいでしょう。

 

2.       一人の主婦の話としたほうが簡単でしょう。

 

添削語の文章

 

Many department stores opened from January 2 this year. Many supermarkets were open even on New Year’s Day. Regarding this trend, there was a comment from a mother working part-time at a supermarket on a newspaper’s opinion column. She complained that she  couldn’t spend time with her children at home on New Year’s Day.

 

 

読者からの投稿 22(あんこ、5 April 10

 

This year, many department stores were close on the first of January, a national holiday in Japan, and were open from the second of January. Years ago, few supermarkets were open on the New Year Day. Recently, many supermarkets stayed open on New Year Day to increase sales. This had changed working styles of employees.  A comment of a mother working part time at a supermarket was appeared in a newspaper. She complained that she sacrificed her time with her family for the supermarket on New Year Day.

 

添削

 

This year, many department stores were closed on the first of January, a national holiday in Japan, and were open on1 from the second of January. Years ago, few supermarkets were open on the New Year’s Day. Recently, many supermarkets stayed open on New Year’s Day to increase sales. This had has2 changed working styles of employees.  A comment of a mother working part time at a supermarket was appeared in the letters to the editor column of a newspaper. She complained that she had to work on New Year’s Day3 and must sacrificed her time with her family for the supermarket on New Year Day.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       「二日から店を開けた」はthe store opened (was openでもよいでしょう) on January the second and onwardですが、文脈からわかるのでonwardは無くてよいでしょう。

 

2.       この記事を書いた時点で、既に変化が完了していたので現在完了形がよいでしょう。正確に言えば、多くのスーパーが元日に店を開けるようになったのは既に過去のことで(例えば五年前)、その時点で既にパートの人たちに影響があったのでhad changed working stylesとなりますが、現在完了形のほうが、「現在ではもうすっかり変わってしまっている」という感じが表現できます。

 

3.       このような説明があるとよいでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

This year, many department stores were closed on the first of January, a national holiday in Japan, and were open on the second of January. Years ago, few supermarkets were open on New Year’s Day. Recently, many supermarkets stayed open on New Year’s Day to increase sales. This has changed working styles of employees. A comment of a mother working part time at a supermarket appeared in the letters to the editor column of a newspaper. She complained that she had to work on New Year’s Day and must sacrifice her time with her family for the supermarket.

 

 

読者からの投稿 21(Tatsuo, 19 January 10

 

Lots of department stores opened from January 2. Supermarkets are common to work on January 1. However, there was a comment on the reader’s column of a newspaper. A certain one mother, who is a part time worker at a supermarket, sent it and complained about current serious sales battles among those stores: “Even the new year holidays, I couldn’t get enough time with my children at home because of my duty.”

 

添削

 

Lots of department stores started their business on opened from January 2 this year1. Nowadays, it is common for Ssupermarkets are common to start their business work on January 1. However, there was a comment on the reader’s column of a newspaper from . A a certain one mother, who was is a part time worker at a supermarket., sent it and She2 complained about current serious sales battles among those stores, saying, : “Even on the nNew Yyear’s holidays, I couldn’t get enough time with my children at home because I had to go to work of my duty.”

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の大部分はわかります。

 

1.       こうしたほうが「今年は1月日から営業を始めた」ということがはっきりするでしょう。

 

2.       ここから新しい文にしたほうが、この主婦の文句の内容がはっきりします。

 

添削後の文章

 

Lots of department stores started their business on January 2 this year. Nowadays, it is common for supermarkets to start their business on January 1. However, there was a comment on the reader’s column of a newspaper from a mother who was a part time worker at a supermarket. She complained about current serious sales battles among those stores, saying ,“Even on the New Year’s holidays, I couldn’t get enough time with my children at home because I had to go to work .”

 

 

読者からの投稿 20(Yoshi, 12 October 09

 

Many department stores opened on January 2th this year. Super markets opened on January 1th. It was no longer rare. But mothers on part time job posted on the correspondences of the news paper "We didn't have time to spend with their children even at New Year's". due to the heavy competitions.

 

添削

 

Many department stores opened on January 2th the second this year. Many1 Ssuper markets even opened on January the first 1th. It was no longer rare. But a mothers2 on a part time job posted on the readers’ column correspondences of a the news paper, "I We didn't have time to spend with my their children even during at the New Year's holidays". ,complaining due to the heavy competitions among retailers3.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容のほぼ総て推測できます。

 

1.       Many supermarkets opened ~.とすると同じ内容の表現がやさしくなります。

 

2.       ここは単数がよいでしょう。

 

3.       complaining ~.と続けると、文の前半とのつながりがよいでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

Many department stores opened on January the second this year. Many supermarkets even opened on January the first. But a mother on a part time job posted on the readers’ column  of a newspaper, "I didn't have time to spend with my children even during the New Year's holidays," complaining heavy competition among retailers.

 

 

読者からの投稿 19(mxotomi, 8 July 09

 

Most department stores started this year’s business on January 2nd. For supermarkets, we have seen an increasing number of them being open on New Year’s Day. A mother who works part-time at a supermarket deplores the fierce business competition among retailers on the letter-to-the-editor column of a new paper, saying “I have no time available any longer to enjoy New Year’s holidays at home with our children.

 

添削

 

Most department stores started this year’s business on January 2nd this year. For supermarkets, we have seen an increasing number of them being open on New Year’s Day for the last several years1. A mother who works part-time at a supermarket deplores the fierce business competition among retailers in on the letter-to-the-editor column of a newspaper paper, saying “I have no time available any longer to enjoy New Year’s holidays at home with our children any longer.

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       このような補足をいれるとhave been seen ~の内容が強調されます。

 

添削後の文章

 

Most department stores started  business on January 2nd this year. For supermarkets, we have seen an increasing number of them being open on New Year’s Day for the last several years. A mother who works part-time at a supermarket deplores the fierce business competition among retailers in the letter-to-the-editor column of a newspaper, saying “I have no time available to enjoy New Year’s holidays at home with our children any longer.

 

 

読者からの投稿 18(ペテルスブルグ、13 July 08

 

A lot of department stores opened already on the second January this year. Some supermarket opens even on the first January, which is recently not unusual. However there was a opinion printed on a newspaper, which was sent from a housewife. She, a part-time working woman at a supermarket, says, “we cannot enjoy relaxed time with our children at home during the new year holidays like before .“lamenting tough business competition.

 

添削

 

A lot of department stores opened already on the second day of January this year. Some Nowadays, supermarket stores that opens even on the first day of January, which is are recently not unusual1. However, there was an opinion sent printed on to a newspaper, which was sent from a housewife,. She, a working part-time working woman at a supermarket,2. She says, “wWe cannot enjoy relaxeding time with our children at home during the new year holidays like we used to before .“lamenting the3 tough business competition.

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。

 

 

1.       Some supermarket stores open even on the first day of January, which is recently not unusual.は文の前半と後半の内容が重複して、後半が付け足しになります。not unusualを強調するように添削しましたが。内容だけに重点を置くなら、Some supermarket stores open even on the first day of January. だけでよいですね。

 

2.       However there was a opinion printed on a newspaper, which was sent from a housewife.  ですと、どうしてこの内容が既知の文章の内容と関連があるかわからないので、添削のように情報を入れるとよいでしょう。

 

3.       この文章で問題にしている小売業界の過当競争なので定冠詞を付けます。

 

添削後の文章

 

A lot of department stores opened already on the second day of January this year. Nowadays, supermarket stores that open even on the first day of January are not unusual. However, there was an opinion sent to a newspaper from a housewife working part-time at a supermarket. She says, “We cannot enjoy relaxing time with our children at home during the new year holidays like we used to.“, lamenting the tough business competition.

 

 

読者からの投稿 17(P&C, 1 July 08

 

Many department stores opened on January 2 this year. It has been usual that supermarkets open on New Year's Day. The other day a correspondence from a female part-timer who has children was on a newspaper. She said "in spite of New Year's Day, I couldn't have a time to relax with children at home". That is a voice lamenting severe sales battle.

 

添削

 

Many department stores opened on January 2 this year. It has been usual popular that supermarkets open even on New Year's Day. The other day a correspondence letter from a female part-timer at a supermarket who has children was on a newspaper. She said, "iIn spite of New Year's Day, I couldn't have a time to relax with my children at home". That was is a voice lamenting the severe sales battles among department stores and supermarkets1..

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       おまけのようですが、この説明を入れたほうが内容がわかりやすくなるでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

Many department stores opened on January 2 this year. It has been popular that supermarkets open even on New Year's Day. The other day a letter from a female part-timer at a supermarket was on a newspaper. She said, "In spite of New Year's Day, I couldn't have a time to relax with my children at home". That was a voice lamenting the severe sales battles among department stores and supermarkets.

 

 

読者からの投稿 16(かい、20 June 08

 

Many department stores opened the store on January 2. Supermarkets doing business without holiday from January 1 have not become rare. However, housewives lamented the competitive selling“ We have no time to relax with my children at home even during the New Year holidays.” And the opinion was placed in the letter column of a newspaper.

 

添削

 

Many department stores opened the store on January 2. Supermarkets doing business without holidays throughout the year from January 1 are increasing in number have not become rare1. However, a housewivesfe working part-time at a supermarket sent a letter to the readers column of a newspaper2, lamenteding the competitive selling among supermarkets, We I have no time to relax with my children at home even during the New Year holidays.” And the opinion was placed in the letter column of a newspaper.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の概略はわかりますが、housewives lamented以下の内容がわかりません。「主婦一般が過当競争のために正月もゆっくり過ごせない」となります。添削のようにスーパーでパートで働く主婦の嘆きと限定するのがよいでしょう。

1.       have not become rare 「まだ珍しくなっていない(まだ元日に店を開けるスーパーがたくさんある)」となり、日本文の内容と異なってきます。Nowadays, many supermarkets are doing business even on January 1.という簡明な表現もあります。

 

2.       「スーパーで働くパートタイマーのお母さん」という内容を文章のどこかに入れる必要があります。 A mother is working part-time at a supermarket. The mother sent a letter to a newspaper.の内容を組み合わせて、A mother, who was working part-time at a supermarket, sent a letter to a newspaper.となります。

 

添削後の文章

 

Many department stores opened the store on January 2. Supermarkets doing business without holidays throughout the year from January 1 are increasing in number. However, a housewife working part-time at a supermarket sent a letter to the readers column of a newspaper, lamenting the competitive selling among supermarkets, “ I have no time to relax with my children at home even during the New Year holidays.”

 

 

 

読者からの投稿 15(kk5 February 07

 

Many department stores opened on January second this year. It has not been rare that many supermarkets open even on January first. But a posting on the reader's column of the newspaper from a mother, who works part-time at a supermarket,  said that she couldn't have time to spend leisurely with her children at home even during the New Year's days, lamenting over the fierce sales battle for stores to eager to run without a break.

 

添削

 

Many department stores opened on January the second this year. It has not been rare that many supermarkets open even on January the first. But a posting on the reader's column of the a newspaper from a mother, who works part-time at a supermarket, said says1 that she couldn't cannot have enough time to spend leisurely with her children at home even during the New Year's holidays, lamenting over the fierce sales battle among supermarkets. for stores to eager to run without a break2.

 

コメント

 

内容のはわかりますが、lamenting over the fierce sales battle for stores to eager to run without a break.のところが意味は推測できますが構文がわかりません。

 

1.       全体を現在形で表現したほうがわかりやすいでしょう。

 

2.       二つのl内容が短絡して表現してあります。添削のように簡単にするか、またはlamenting over the fierce sales battle for superstores to be engaged in and eager to run keep their stores open without a breakとすることもできます。

 

添削後の文章

 

Many department stores opened on January the second this year. It has not been rare that supermarkets open even on January the first. But a posting on the reader's column of a newspaper from a mother, who works part-time at a supermarket, says that she cannot have enough time to spend with her children at home even during the New Year's holidays  lamenting over the fierce sales battle among supermarkets.

 

 

読者からの投稿 14(dunkel, 8 November 07

 

Most of the department stores opened from the second of January this year. Many supermarkets opened even on the first day of the year. The reason of this related to the severe business competition in retail markets. A parttime worker of a supermarket wrote a letter to the newspaper in which she said she could find rare time to stay and play with her children in her home even though it had been the New Year's holidays.

 

添削

 

Most of the department stores opened on from the second of January this year. Many supermarkets even opened even on the first day of the year. They had to keep their stores open as much as possible to stay in1 The reason of this related to the severe business competition in retail markets. A part-time worker of a supermarket wrote a letter to a the newspaper that in which she said she could rarely find rare time to stay home and play with her children in her home even though it had been  even during the New Year's holidays.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の総てがわかります。

 

「激しい商戦を勝ち抜くために元日も休まずに営業する」という論理には、本当にそうなのかな、という疑問も起こります。ここではそういうことにして、添削のように説明を補足しました。

 

添削後の文章

 

Most department stores opened on the second of January this year. Many supermarkets even opened on the first day of the year. They had to keep their stores open as much as possible to stay in the severe business competition in retail markets. A part-time worker of a supermarket wrote a letter to a newspaper that she could rarely find time to stay home and play with her children even during New Year's holidays.

 

 

読者からの投稿 13(マーチャン、26 August 07

 

Many department stores opened their store on January 2 this year. It is not rare that super markets open their store for business even on January 1. But a mother working for a supermarket as a part-timer gave her opinion to the readers' column of a newspaper. She lamented such heavy competitions and said, "I can not find time to relax with my children at home even on the statutory holiday of January.

 

添削

 

Many department stores opened their store on January 2 this year. Nowadays, Iit is not rare that super markets open their store for business even on January 1. But a mother working for a supermarket as a part-timer gave her opinion to the readers' column of a newspaper. She lamented such heavy competitions and said, "I can not find time to relax with my children at home even during on the statutory New Year’s2 holidays of January.1

 

コメント

 

1.       英文の内容の総てがわかります。

 

2.       これを入れたほうが内容がはっきりするでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

Many department stores opened on January 2 this year. Nowadays, it is not rare that super markets open for business even on January 1. But a mother working for a supermarket as a part-timer gave her opinion to the readers' column of a newspaper. She lamented such heavy competition and said, "I can not find time to relax with my children at home even during the statutory New Year’s holidays.

 

 

読者からの投稿 12(散歩人、15 April 07

 

Many of departments operated from 2nd, January. It is not quite unusual that supermarkets are open even during the New Year's holiday. Although it is convenient for customers, there was the comment, "Regardless of the New Year's holiday, I don't have time enough to spent with my children in my house." in letters column of newspaper. This is something to lament the heavy competitions among supermarkets.

 

添削

 

Many of departments stores1 started their business operated from on the second of 2nd, January this year3. It is not quite unusual that supermarkets are open even during the New Year's holiday holidays3. Although it is convenient for customers, there was a complaint in the letters column of a newspaper saying, the comment, "Regardless of In spite of4 the New Year's holidays, I don't have time enough to spent with my children in my house at home5." in letters column of newspaper. This is something to lament the heavy competitions among supermarkets.

 

コメント

 

1.       日本語のデパートはa department storeです。日本語化した英語はうっかりそのまま使ってしまいますね。昔、まだ手動のタイプライターを使っていたときに、コピーと取るにはカーボンペーパーというものを紙と紙の間に挟んでタイプしました。カナダに来て間もなく、文房具屋にこのカーボンペーパーを買いに行きました。カーボンペーパーは日本語だから、英語ではなんと言うのだろうと考えて、Please give me a sheet of carbonated paper.〈炭酸入りの紙〉と言ったことがあります。カーボンペーパーは買えましたが、英語でもa sheet of carbon paperでした。

 

2.       operatedというと工場が稼動した、という雰囲気なので添削のようにしました。日付はJanuary 2, January the second, January second, the second of Januaryと表記方法がいろいろあります。現在では簡略な表記法のJanuary 2が多いようですが、英文の中に数字が入るのを嫌う人(大きな数の時は仕方がありませんが)がいて、January secondと表記しています。

 

3.       正月休みは休日が何日もあるのでholidaysとなります。

 

4.       「正月休みにもかかわらず」にはIn spite of ~がよいでしょう。regardless of ~は「正月休みとは関係ないことだか」となります。この例題の文脈ではEven during the New Year’s holidaysとするともっと的確でしょう。

 

5.       in my houseは「わたしの家の中で」と地理的な場所をしめします。at homeは「家(家庭)で」となり家族と一緒に生活する場所をしめします。

 

添削後の文章

 

Many of department stores started their business on the second of January this year. It is not quite unusual that supermarkets are open even during the New Year's holidays. Although it is convenient for customers, there was a complaint in the letters column of a newspaper saying, " In spite of the New Year's holidays, I don't have time enough to spent with my children at home." This is something to lament the heavy competitions among supermarkets.

 

 

読者からの投稿 11(あすか、12 December 06

 

Most of department stores have started their business from January 2, this year. However, as for supermarkets, the stores where open even on the New Year' Day are increasing. On a newspaper, I saw a letter from working mom who is struggling with her job at supermarket competing to other storesand she said, "Even though the New Year's days, I hardly spent with my children at home".

 

添削

 

Most of department stores have started1 their business from on2 January 2, this year. However, as for supermarkets, the number of stores where which opened even on the New Year' Day increased3 are increasing. On a newspaper, I saw a letter from a working mom mother4 who is was struggling with her job at a supermarket which5 was competing to against other stores.and sShe said, "Even though during the New Year's daysholidays, I hardly spent time with my children at home".

 

コメント

 

1.       過去の出来事の記述なのでとくに現在完了形にする必要なないでしょう。

 

2.       「二日から」とありますが、started their business とありのでstarted their business on January 2で「二日からずっと店を開けている」の意味になります。

 

3.       ここも過去形でよいでしょう。

 

4.       mom は子供が母親を呼ぶ愛称ですから、口語文で使うとき以外はmotherがよいでしょう。

 

5.       関係代名詞を入れるとcompetingしているのが何かはっきりします。

 

添削後の文章

 

Most of department stores started their business on January 2 this year. However, as for supermarkets, the number of stores which opened even on New Year' Day increased. On a newspaper, I saw a letter from a working mother who was struggling with her job at a supermarket which was competing against other stores. She said, "Even during the New Year's holidays, I hardly spent time with my children at home".

 

 

読者からの投稿 10(吉、1 December 06

 

This year, most of department stores started their operations on the second of January. Recently, it is not unusual that supermarkets are open even on the first day of the year. A mother, who works for supermarket as a part-timer, posted a message to the letters column, deploring the frantic selling; "I couldn’t find time to relax with my children at home even during the New Year's holidays."

 

添削

 

This year, most of department stores started their operations business on the second of January. Recently, it is not unusual that supermarkets are open even on the first day of the year. A mother, who works for a supermarket as a part-timer, posted a message to the letters column of a newspaper, deploring the frantic sellingcompetition among department stores and supermarkets1;, "I couldn’t cannot2 find time to relax with my children at home even during the New Year's holidays."

 

コメント

 

1.       このような説明のほうがわかりやすいでしょう。

 

2.       現在もスーパーで働いているので、現在形にします。

 

添削後の文章

 

This year, most of department stores started their business on the second of January. Recently, it is not unusual that supermarkets are open even on the first day of the year. A mother, who works for a supermarket as a part-timer, posted a message to the letters column of a newspaper, deploring the frantic competition among department stores and supermarkets, "I cannot find time to relax with my children at home even during the New Year's holidays."

 

 

読者からの投稿 9(岩ちゃん、11 November 06

 

Many of department stores opened their store on January 2 this year. It is not rare that super markets open their store for business without closing their store even on January 1. But a mother working for a supermarket as a part-timer gave her opinion to the readers' column of a newspaper. She lamented such heavy competitions and said "I can not find time to lead a unhurried life with my children at home in spite of January 1.

 

添削

 

Many of1 department stores opened their store on January 2 this year. It is not rare that super markets open their store for business without closing their store 2even on January 1. But a mother working for a supermarket as a part-timer gave her opinion to the readers' column of a newspaper. She lamented such heavy competitions and said, "I can not find time to lead a unhurried life relax with my children at home even on the statutory holiday in spite3 of January 1.

 

コメント

 

1.       このofはあってもよいですが、最近は省略することが普通です。

 

2.       even on January 1とあるので、これは省略したほうがよいでしょう。

 

3.       このような補足説明を入れると内容がはっきりします。全体に読みやすい文章ですね。

 

添削後の文章

 

Many department stores opened their store on January 2 this year. It is not rare that super markets open their store for business even on January 1. But a mother working for a supermarket as a part-timer gave her opinion to the readers' column of a newspaper. She lamented such heavy competitions and said, "I can not find time to relax with my children at home even on the statutory holiday of January 1.

 

 

読者からの投稿 8(tange, 15 March 06

 

The second of January was the first selling day for many department stores in this year. Additionally it was not rare that super-markets opened on the New Years day recently. But I read a letter to the editor from a mother who worked for a super market as a part timer and had dissatisfaction with a heavy competition of the New Years day. She complained, ’I don't have enough time to spend with my children in spite of the New Year's holiday’.

 

添削

 

The second of January was the first selling day for many department stores in this year. Additionally it was is1 not rare that super-markets opened on the New Years dDay recently. But I read a letter to the editor in a newspaper from a mother who worked for a super market as a part timer and had dissatisfaction with a heavy competition among supermarkets of the New Years day. She complained, ’I don't have enough time to spend with my children in even during spite of the New Year's holidays2’.

 

コメント

 

1.       これは現在の状況なので現在形で表現します。

 

2.       元日だけでなく正月休みの数日間を指すのならduring the New Year holidaysと複数にするのがよいでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

The second of January was the first day for many department stores this year. Additionally it is not rare that super-markets open on the New Years Day recently. But I read a letter to the editor in a newspaper from a mother who worked for a super market as a part timer and had dissatisfaction with a heavy competition among supermarkets. She complained, ’I don't have enough time to spend with my children even during the New Year holidays’.

 

 

読者からの投稿 7(rikarika, 10 August 05

 

Many department stores started to open from 2nd this year. As for supermarkets, opening from New Year’s Day become not unusual. But I found a supermarket part-time working mother’s worried contribution on a newspaper. Because of hard sales offensive, she lost the time to spent with her children even on New Year's Day.

 

添削

 

Many department stores started to open  from on January 12nd this year. As for supermarkets, opening from on the New Year’s Day has2 become not unusual. But I found a a letter to a newspaper by a mother working part-time at a supermarket part-time working mother’s worried contribution on a newspaper3. Because of the hard sales offensive, she has lost the time to spent spend with her children even on the New Year's Day.

 

コメント

 

1.       started to openとあるのでonにします。これで1月2日からずっと店を開くとわかります。

 

2.       すでにこのようにしているのでhas becomeにします。

 

3.       a supermarket part-time working mother’s worried contribution on a newspaperは謎解きのようで面白く、また英字紙ではこのような表現も使いますが、一般的な文章には添削のようにするとよいでしょう。新聞への投稿はcontributionともいいますが、一般的にはa letter to a newspaperのほうがわかりやすいでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

Many department stores started to open on January 2nd this year. As for supermarkets, opening on the New Year’s Day has become not unusual. But I found a a letter to a newspaper by a mother working part-time at a supermarket. Because of the hard sales offensive, she has lost the time to spend with her children even on the New Year's Day.

 

 

読者からの投稿 6(オーピー、30 May 05

 

In this year almost all of department stores have opened since January 2nd. Lately it is not strange that Super market stores open in the New year day. "Even in the New year day I can't stay my house with my children and can't relax." a mother working in a supermarket as a part-time worker wrote in a letter lamented tough business competition to a news paper.

 

添削

 

In tThis year1, almost all of department stores have opened been open2 since January 2nd. Lately it is not strange common3 that Ssuper market stores open in on the New yYear’s dDay. "Even in on the New yYear’s dDay I can't stay and relax4 my house at home with my children and can't relax.," a mother working in a supermarket as a part-time worker wrote in a letter to a news paper, lamentinged tough business competition5 to a news paper.

 

コメント

 

1.       in this year、この(特別な)年には、と今年を特別に強調したいときにはin を付けて使いますが、普通に「今年は」と言うときには、this yearと副詞として使うの一般的です。

 

2.       「開業している」状態が続いている、という表現には have been open since January 2ndが良いでしょう。

 

3.       it is not strangeを肯定表現にするとit is commonになります。二重否定の内容(珍しくは無い)を肯定表現(一般的である)にしたほうが内容がわかりやすくなります。

 

4.       I can’t stay and relax at homeと続けるとリズム感があり、内容もわかりやすくなります。

 

5.       わかりやすく上手に英文で表現していますね。

 

添削後の文章

 

This year, almost all department stores have been open since January 2nd. Lately it is common that supermarket stores open on the New Year’s Day. "Even on the New Year’s Day I can't stay and relax at home with my children," a mother working in a supermarket as a part-time worker wrote in a letter to a news paper, lamenting tough business competition.

 

 

読者からの投稿 5(かっぱん、12 April 05

 

Though, most department stores started their business from January second this year, many supermarkets opened on the first. A part-time worker at a supermarket wrote her complaints about the fierce business war in a newspaper that she had no time to spend with her children even in New Year holidays.

 

添削

 

Though,1 most department stores started their business from on January second this year, many supermarkets opened on the first. A part-time worker at a supermarket wrote her complaints about the fierce business war competition2 in a newspaper that she had no time to spend with her children even in New Year holidays.

 

コメント

 

1.       thoughで始まる節は主文が後に来るので読者に「これは前節で後にもっと大事な事が書いてあるんだな」という緊張感を与える効果があります。しかし、この節が長すぎると読者が頭の中で覚えていなくてはいけないことが大きくなりすぎて読みにくくなります(ほんの1秒足らずの記憶を必要とするだけなのに不思議なものです。)Most department stores started ~, but many supermarkets opened ~.とすると文に緊張感はなくなりますが、読者は内容を前から順々に理解していけばよいので読みやすくなります。さてこの練習問題ではどっちがよいでしょうか。文章の後のお母さんの声はスーパーの話なので、それとの関連を考えて、私の好みはbutです。

 

2.       Business warというと短期的な、または特別な商戦という場合が多いので、もっと恒常的な商戦を表すためにbusiness competitionにしました。私の町では一年に数回gasoline warがあります。同じ道筋のガソリンスタンドが値下げ競争を始めます。朝仕事に出かけるときに「あれ、ずいぶん安いガソリンスタンドが有る」と思い帰り道で確かめると、数件のガソリンスタンドが同じ安い値段を出しています。このgasoline warは長続きせず、23日続けばよいほうです。

 

添削後の文章

 

Though most department stores started their business on January second this year, many supermarkets opened on the first. A part-time worker at a supermarket wrote her complaints about the fierce business competition in a newspaper that she had no time to spend with her children even in New Year holidays.

 

 

読者からの投稿 4 (マウント60、1 July 04)

 

Many department stores opened for the first business this year on the 2nd. These days, more and more supermarkets are open on January 1st. However, there was a letter of complaint about tough business competition sent to a letter-to-the-editor column in a newspaper by a mother working part-time at a supermarket. She wrote, "I have now no time to spend at leisure with my children at home even during New Year holidays."

 

添削

 

Many department stores opened for the first business on the 2nd of January this year on the 2nd. These days, more and more supermarkets are open even on January 1st to survive tough competition. However, there was a letter of complaint about tough business competition sent to a letter-to-the-editor column in a newspaper by a mother working part-time at a supermarket complaining. She wrote, "I have now no time to spend at leisure with my children at home even during New Year holidays."

 

コメント

 

マウント60さんは日本文の内容を丁寧に英文で表現しています。添削は投稿を少し読みやすくしました。

 

添削後の文章

 

Many department stores opened for business on the 2nd of January this year. These days, more and more supermarkets are open even on January 1st to survive tough competition. However, there was a letter-to-the-editor in a newspaper by a mother working part-time at a supermarket complaining, "I have now no time to spend at leisure with my children at home even during New Year holidays."

 

 

読者からの投稿 3 (tama, 4 March 04)

 

Many of department stores were opened on January 2 this year, though it is new year’s holiday. And also it has not been rare that supermarkets are opened even in January 1.

 

But a letter of column in a newspaper said a house wife, a part time job worker in supermarket, had mourned she had no time feeling at ease at home with her children even in new year holiday through heavy competition among supermarkets.

 

添削

 

Many of -department stores were1 opened on January 2 second2 this year, though it is was a new year’s holiday. And also it has not been rare that supermarkets are opened open even in on January first 1.

 

But a letter of column in at to the newspaper said from3 a house wife, a part time job worker in a supermarket, had mourned4 said that she had no time feeling at ease at home with her children even in during the new year holidays through because5 heavy competition among supermarkets forced her to work during the new year holidays.

 

コメント

 

1.       openI opened the door. The store opens at eight o’clock.のように他動詞と自動詞の両方に使います。ここでは自動詞に使うほうが良いでしょう。

 

2.       文章の中の日時の表現方法はいろいろあります。I was born on January 2, 1965.のように年号のあるときは月日のほうは January 2と書くのはふつうです。しかし短い文章のなかで月日だけを述べるときは、January second (正確にはJanuary the secondですが、一般にJanuary secondと省略されています)としたほうが文の中で釣り合いがとれます(文の中に数字という異質なものが無くなる)。

 

3.       添削のようにすると新聞に投稿した人とスーパーで働いている人が同一人だということがはっきりします。

 

4.       この後に続く文で主婦が嘆いているという内容がわかるので、ここでは単にsaidでよいでしょう。また「〜を嘆く」は日本語でよく使われる表現ですが、内容を考えると「悲嘆にくれている」という本来の意味よりも、この場合のように「〜に文句を言いたくなる」と軽い意味に使われることが多いです。ここでもshe complained that ~とすることも出来ます。

 

5.       「激しい商戦を嘆く」には「激しい商戦のために正月休みも返上して仕事にでる」と言う意味があるので、この説明を付け加えます。日本文ではこの例のように読者にわかる内容は省略する癖があります(ときには省略し過ぎて内容がわからなくなることもあります)。しかし、英文では少しくどいほどに説明をして、省略を避ける癖があります。日本文の内容を英文で表現するときには、日本文で省略された部分を補足して表現する必要があります。この「日本文で省略されているところを英文では補足して表現する」ということはなかなか難しいです。日本語の発想と英語の発想の相違があるからです。日本語で論理的な(読者にわかる)文章の構成でも英語圏の人にはわからないことがあり、またその逆もあります。日本人が英文を書くときはまずはくどいほどに細かく英文を書くのが良いと思います。そして経験を積むうちに英文ではどの部分が省略できるかわかってきます。

 

添削後の文章

 

Many department stores opened on January second this year, though it was a new year’s holiday. And it has not been rare that supermarkets open even on January first .

 

But a letter t to the newspaper from a house wife, a part time worker in a supermarket, said that she had no time feeling at ease at home with her children even during the new year holidays because heavy competition among supermarkets forced her to work during the new year holidays.

 

 

読者からの投稿 2(tonton, 24 May 03

 

This year many department stores started their business on January the second. It is no longer rare to see supermarkets open even on New Year's Day either. A mother who works at a supermarket part-time contributed an article to some newspaper. She sighed that now she doesn't have any time to spend with her children on New Year's Day because of the intense business competition among the supermarkets.  

 

添削

 

This year, many department stores started their business on January the second . and It it1 is no longer rare to see supermarkets open even on New Year's Day either. A mother who works at a supermarket part-time contributed an article to some a newspaper. She sighed complains2 that now she doesn't have any time has little time3 to spend with her children on New Year's Day. because of the intense business competition among the supermarkets4.  

 

コメント

 

tontonさんの投稿は(sighedsighsに変えて)原文のままでもよいと思います。少しコスメティックな(読みやすくなるような)添削をしました。

 

1.       andでつないだ方が内容の連絡がよくなります。

 

2.       北米人の価値感覚を使うと「黙って嘆く」より「(声をだして)文句を言う」ことになります。

 

3.       「ほとんど時間がない」have little time to do (for ~doing) Aという表現をよく使います。

 

4.       私もtontonさんのように英語で表現するとおもいますが、よく考えてみると、この内容はすでに前の文に含まれていますね。

 

She complains以下を少し新聞の解説風に次のようにも表現できます。

 

The intense business competition among supermarkets has taken away her time to spend with her children on New Year’s Day.

 

非人称主語は日本語では馴染みがうすいですが英文ではよく使います。非人称主語の英文を日本語に直訳すると変な感じのする日本語になりますが、英語を母語とする人には非人称主語の文はこのような感じにはなりません。非人称主語の英文を書けるようになると、ずいぶん英文にも慣れたことになります(私はまだまだですが)。非人称主語を使うときにはあまり主語が長くならないように注意することが大切です。

 

読者からの投稿 1(えり、9 Feb 03

 

This year, most department stores opened on January the second. It is now common for super markets to open on the New Year’s Day. I found a letter from a mother who worked at a super market in the newspaper. She complained that every year competition among department stores and super markets is getting tougher and tougher and she had to work during the New Year holidays and hardly had time to spend with her children at home.

 

添削

 

This year, most department stores opened on the second of January the second. It is now common for super markets supermarkets to open on the New Year’s Day. I found in the newspaper1 a letter from a mother who worked at a super market supermarket in the newspaper. She complained that every year competition among department stores and super markets supermarkets is getting tougher and tougher2 and she had to work during the New Year holidays and hardly had any time to spend with her children at home.

 

コメント

 

1.       in the newspaperをここに入れたほうが、読者がどのような手紙か早くわかります。

 

2.       Every year, competition among department stores and supermarkets is getting tougher and tougher.を文章の最初の持ってくると、そのあとの文の内容と関連して文章全体の論理の流れが良くなります。

 

添削後の文章

 

Every year competition among department stores and supermarkets is getting tougher and tougher. This year, most department stores opened on the second of January. It is now common for supermarkets to open on New Year’s Day. I found in the newspaper a letter from a mother who worked at a supermarket. She complained that she had to work during the New Year holidays and hardly had any time to spend with her children at home.

 

 

練習問題 22

 

大学入試センター試験の英語は読解力重視の傾向が今年も続いている。問題に難易のばらつきがみられるが、平均点は昨年より上がるだろう。

 

読者からの投稿 21(owl, 17 December 13

 

The English exam of the National Center Test for universities put emphasis on reading comprehension this year again. There were some very difficult questions as well as quite easy ones, but the average score this year will be higher than last year.

 

添削

 

The English exam examination of the National Center Test for universities put emphasis on reading comprehension this year again. There were some very difficult questions as well as quite easy ones, but the average score this year will be higher than last year.

 

コメント

 

内容のすべてがわかります。

 

1.       An examは学生がよく使いますが、ここでは一般的にan examinationにしました。

 

添削後の文章

 

The English examination of the National Center Test for universities put emphasis on reading comprehension this year again. There were some very difficult questions as well as quite easy ones, but the average score this year will be higher than last year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 20(文月、5 September 13

 

In the English exam of the National Center for University Entrance Examinations, there has been a tendency to place greater importance on the ability of reading comprehension. The tendency is also seen in this year. This year's problems vary in difficulty. Probably the average score will be higher than that of last year.

 

添削

 

In the English examination of the National Center for University Entrance Examinations, there has been a tendency to place greater importance on the ability of reading comprehension. The tendency was1 is also seen in this year. This year's problems varied vary in difficulty. Probably the average score will be higher than that of last year.

 

コメント

 

内容のすべてがわかります。

 

1.       この記事は試験の後で、まだ平均点が発表されていない時点でかかれたものとおもいます。

 

添削後の文章

 

In the English examination of the National Center for University Entrance Examinations, there has been a tendency to place greater importance on the ability of reading comprehension. The tendency was also seen this year. This year's problems varied in difficulty. Probably the average score will be higher than that of last year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 19(Valley winds, 17 March 12

 

English test held at the National Center Test continued to tend to emphasize reading skill this year. Exam questions seemed to be a variety of level and the average score the test would been higher than the last year.

 

添削

 

The English test held at the National Center Test continued to tend to emphasize reading skills this year too. Exam The questions this year1 seemed to include be a variety of difficulty levels and the average score the test would been higher than the last year.

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       Higher than the last yearという比較なので、文のどこかにthis yearを入れると比較がはっきりします。

 

添削語の文章

 

The English test held at the National Center Test continued to emphasize reading skills this year too. The questions this year seemed to include a variety of difficulty levels and the average score would been higher than the last year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 18(あんこ、10 April 10

 

National Center Test for University Admissions considers reading comprehension as the most important ability of English. So this year, too, the questions consist mainly of readings. Although the questions vary level of difficulty, the average score will be expected to be higher than last year.

 

添削

 

The National Center Test for University Admissions considers reading comprehension as the most important ability of for English. So this year again, too, the English test questions consisted mainly of questions on readings comprehension. Although the questions varyied in the level of difficulty, the average score is1 will be expected to be higher than last year.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の大部分はわかりますが、大学入試センターのいろいろなテストの中の英語のテストについてだということを明確にするとよいでしょう。

 

1.       be expected to ~はそれ自体で未来の事象を記述しているので、普通にはwill be expected to ~という形にはしません。

 

添削後の文章

 

The National Center Test for University Admissions considers reading comprehension as the most important ability for English. So this year again, the English test consisted mainly of questions on reading comprehension. Although the questions varied in the level of difficulty, the average score is expected to be higher than last year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 17(Tatsuo, 20 January 10

 

The tendency to importance of reading ability for the English test of the National Center for University Entrance Examination has seemed to continue in this year. The difficulty of each question can be found unevenness. But the average score will be better than that of last year.

 

添削

 

The tendency to place importance on of reading ability in for the English test in of the National Center for University Entrance Examination has seemed to have continued in this year. The difficulty of each English questions was  can be found unevenness from question to question. Bbut the average score will be better than that of last year.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の概略はわかりますが、最初の文の内容がplaceが抜けているのでわかりません。

 

1.       seems to have continued 現在までずっと続いているようだ。

seemed to have continued until last year 去年まで続いていたようだ。

のように過去完了形は主導しに時制を基準にして、そのときまでに完了していることを表現します。

 

添削後の文章

 

The tendency to place importance on reading ability in the English test in the National Center for University Entrance Examination seemed to have continued this year. The difficulty of English questions was found uneven from question to question, but the average score will be better than last year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 16(Yoshi, 13 October 09

 

English of the National Center Test for universities has been tendency toward importance of reading comprehension as well as this year. Questions vary difficulty but the average of the score will be up than last year.

 

添削

 

The English test of the National Center Test for uUniversitiesy Admission has continued1 to place an emphasis been tendency toward importance of on reading comprehension as well as this year. Questions varyied in difficulty but the average of the score will be higher up than last year.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の推測できますが、細部はわかりません。

 

1.       has continued this yearとすると、「〜今年まで続いている」となります。

 

添削後の文章

 

The English test of the National Center Test for University Admission has continued to place an emphasis on reading comprehension this year. Questions varied in difficulty but the average score will be higher than last year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 15(mxtomi, 8 July 09

 

The trend toward an emphasis on the reading comprehension in English was seen continuing in the National Center Test for University Admissions this year. Although the level of difficulty varied largely from one question to another, the mean of the test score is expected to be higher than in the previous year.

 

添削

 

The trend toward an emphasis on the reading comprehension in English continued1 was seen continuing in the National Center Test for University Admissions this year. Although the level of difficulty varied largely from one question to another, the mean of the test score is expected to be higher than in the previous year.

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       このような簡略な表現のほうがよいでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

The trend toward an emphasis on reading comprehension in English continued in the National Center Test for University Admissions this year. Although the level of difficulty varied largely from one question to another, the mean of the test score is expected to be higher than the previous year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 14(かい、21 June 08

 

Test of English which is conducted by the National Center for University Entrance Examinations tends to emphasize the reading comprehension again this year. The challenge level of the test varies from question to question, but the average score will be higher than that of last years.

 

添削

 

Test of The English test which was1 is conducted by the National Center for University Entrance Examinations tends to continued to emphasize the reading comprehension again this year. The challenge level of difficulty of the test variesd from question to question, but the average score will be higher than that of last years2.

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       この記事が書かれたときには既にセンター試験は終わっていました。したがって過去形になります。

 

2.       The average score this year will be higher than last year.という形になります。

 

添削後の文章

 

The English test which was conducted by the National Center for University Entrance Examinations continued to emphasize reading comprehension again this year. The level of difficulty of the test varied from question to question, but the average score will be higher than last year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 13(kk, 6 February 08

 

The English test by the National Center for University Entrance Examinations continued to have a tendency to emphasize reading comprehension again this year. The challenge levels of the tests have varied through years but it seems that the average score of this year will be higher than last year.

 

添削

 

The English test by the National Center for University Entrance Examinations continued to have a tendency to emphasize reading comprehension again this year. The challenge levels of difficulty the tests have varied through from question to question years but it seems appears that the average score of this year will be higher than last year.

 

コメント

 

内容の概略はわかりますが、The challenge levels of the tests have varied through years.the challenge levelsの意味がわかりません。また、「問題に難易のばらつきがみられる」はこの年の英語の問題の間に難易のばらつきみられる」ことだとおもいます。

 

添削後の文章

 

The English test by the National Center for University Entrance Examinations continued to emphasize reading comprehension again this year. The level of difficulty varied from question to question but it appears that the average score will be higher than last year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 12(dunkel, 9 Nov 07

 

The test of English on the National Center Test for university admission in Japan still tends to regard the reading skills as more important this year. We will find that the average score of the examination will be higher than that of last year even though there are some differences of the degree of the difficulty of the questions.

 

添削

 

The test of English on the National Center Test examination1 for university admission in Japan still tends to regards the reading comprehension skills as the more important this year. We expect will find that the average score of the English test examination will be higher than that of last year even though there are some differences in of the degree of the difficulty among of the questions.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       大学入試センターの試験全体をan examination、その中の英語試験をa test of Englishとするとよいでしょう。

 

2.       stillがあるのでtends toは省略します。

 

添削後の文章

 

The test of English on the National Center Test examination for university admission in Japan still regards reading comprehension as the more important this year. We expect that the average score of the English test will be higher than that of last year even though there are some differences in the degree of difficulty among the questions.

 

 

読者からの投稿 11(マーチャン、26 August 07

 

English in the University Testing Center Examination continued its trend to put the first priority on reading comprehension ability again this year. The questions varied in difficulty , but this year's average mark will be higher than last year's.

 

添削

 

English in the University Testing Center Examination continued its trend to put the first2 priority on reading comprehension ability again this year. The questions varied in difficulty , but this year's average mark will be higher than last year's.1

 

コメント

 

1.       英文の内容の総てがわかります。簡潔な英文です。English in the University Testing Center Examinationだけで英語のテストとわかります。

 

2.       priorityとあるので一番、二番としなくてよいでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

English in the University Testing Center Examination continued its trend to put the priority on reading comprehension again this year. The questions varied in difficulty, but this year's average mark will be higher than last year's.

 

 

読者からの投稿 10(散歩人、15 April 07

 

The tendency that the National Center Test is at the top of reading ability in English has been continued this year also.  Although there seems to be several difficulties in this problems, the average score of this year would be upper than last year.

 

添削

 

The tendency that the English test by the National Center Test for University Admissions places an emphasis on is at the top of reading ability in English has been continued this year too also1.  Although there seems to be several levels of difficultyies in this these problems, the average score of this year would will be upper higher than last year.

 

コメント

 

1.       「大学入試センター試験の英語は読解力重視の傾向が今年も続いている。」の要点は「英語の試験は読解力に重点を置く。」An English test places an emphasis on reading ability.またはもっと簡単にAn English test emphasizes reading ability.と表現できます。後者はS+V+Oの基本文型ですね。あとは「ある傾向が今年も続いた。」The tendency has continued this year too.です。この小文をつなげるときは散歩人さんのようにthe tendencyと最初の小文を同格にして、The tendency that the English test (by the National Test Center for University Admissions) places an emphasis on reading ability has continued this year too.とすればよいですね。

 

添削後の文章

 

The tendency that the English test by the National Center Test for University Admissions places an emphasis on reading ability has continued this year too. Although there seems to be several levels of difficulty in these problems, the average score of this year will be higher than last year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 9(吉、3 December 06

 

On this year's English test of National Center Test for University Admissions, there was still continued trend to place a significance on reading ability. Although a difficulty of each question was unequal, the average score of the test seems to become higher than last year.

 

添削

 

On In this year's English test of by the National Center Test for University Admissions, there was still a continued continuing trend to place an emphasis significance on reading ability. Although a the level of difficulty1 of each varied from one question was unequal to another2, the average score of the test seems is expected3 to become be higher than last year.

 

コメント

 

1.       difficulty は抽象名詞なので難易度はa level of difficultyとするとよいでしょう。

 

2.       The price of wine varies widely from one vintage to another. The price of wine varies according to its vintage.というときに使うvaryという便利な言葉があります。

 

3.       この記事はセンター試験は終了したが、結果はまだ出ていないときに書かれたようです。「平均点は昨年より上がるだろう」とあるので is expected to be higher than last yearがっよいでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

In this year's English test by the National Center Test for University Admissions, there was still a continuing trend to place an emphasis on reading ability. Although the level of difficulty varied from one question to another, the average score of the test is expected to be higher than last year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 8(岩ちゃん、11 November 06

 

English in the University Testing Center Examination has a trend to put the first priority on a reading comprehension ability again this year. It is seen that the questions vary in difficulty level, but this year's average mark will rise more than last year's.

 

添削

 

English in the University Testing Center Examination has continued1 its a trend to put the first priority on a reading comprehension ability again this year. It is seen that2 tThe questions varyied in difficulty level, but this year's average mark will rise be more higher3 than last year's.

 

コメント

 

1.       continued its trend ~ again this yearとしたほうが簡単な表現になります。again this yearとあるので、現在完了形ではなくて、過去形になります。It has continued its trend since 2000.というような形では現在完了形で、ずっと続いている、ことを表現します。

 

2.       「問題に難易のばらつきがみられる」のような表現が新聞記事には多いですが、英文で表現するときは要らないときが多いです。It is seen by the expert that global warming is real. (The expert sees that global warming is real.のほうがよいですが)のような時には「誰が言っているかが大切ですが、この問題のような例では、ただ受動態で表現しただけです。

 

3.       rise more than last year’sとするとriseが「上昇する」ですから、「去年の平均点の上がり方より、今年の平均点の上がり方のほうが大きかった」という意味にも取れます。

 

添削後の文章

 

English in the University Testing Center Examination continued its trend to put the first priority on reading comprehension ability again this year. The questions varied in difficulty , but this year's average mark will be higher than last year's.

 

 

読者からの投稿 7(tange, 16 March 06

 

The trend of focusing on reading comprehension in English has continued in the National Center the National Centre for University Entrance Examination, which many students have to take before individual examinations by universities. Although there are variations in the level of difficulties, the average score will increase than last year.

 

添削

 

The trend of towards focusing on reading comprehension in English has continued this year in the National Center the National Centre for University Entrance Examination, which many students have to take before individual examinations by universities1. Although there are were2 variations in the level of difficultiesy, the average score will increase be higher3 than last year.

 

コメント

 

1.       大学入試センター試験の説明があるのが読者に親切ですね。

 

2.       この記事は大学入試センター試験が終了したがまだ結果が出ないときに書かれたものでしょう。

 

3.       thanを使った比較なので形容詞の比較級が必要です。the average score this year will increase from that of the in the last year. と表現できますが、比較級を使ったほうがわかりやすいです。

 

添削後の文章

 

The trend towards focusing on reading comprehension in English has continued this year in the National Center the National Centre for University Entrance Examination, which many students have to take before individual examinations by universities. Although there were variations in the level of difficulty, the average score will be higher than last year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 6(rikarika, 10 August 05

 

English university entrance examination given by national center is consequently putting more emphasis on reading comprehension in this year. There are some scatters in difficulty although average mark will be higher than that of last year.

 

添削

 

The English university entrance examination given by the National Center1 Test for University national center is consequently has put2 putting more emphasis on reading comprehension in this year too. There are some scatters variations in the difficulty from question to question3, although but4 the average mark will be higher than that of last year.

 

コメント

 

1.       固有名詞なのでグーグルサーチなどで見つけてください。

 

2.       「今年も続いている」has put ~ this year too.とします。

 

3.       補足説明をつけると内容がわかりやすくなります。

 

4.       although を使うと「平均点は上がるだろうが、難易度にばらつきがあった。」というような意味になります。butを使って「難易度にばらつきはあったが、平均点は上がるだろう」にしたほうが因果関係、時間関係がはっきりします。

 

添削後の文章

 

The English university entrance examination given by the National Center Test for University has put more emphasis on reading comprehension this year too. There are some variations in the difficulty from question to question, but the average mark will be higher than last year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 5(かっぱん、12 April 05

 

English test of the National Center Test for University in this year puts emphasis to measure reading comprehension following the trend in the previous year. Though the level of difficulty varies widely from question to question, the average score is expected to be higher than that of last year.

 

添削

 

The English test of the National Center Test for Universityies in this year puts continues to place1 emphasis to on measure reading comprehension following the trend in the previous years. Though the level of difficulty varies widely from question to question, the average score is expected to be higher than that of last year.

 

コメント

 

1.       「今年も続いている」ということなのでcontinues to place emphasis on ~としました。

 

添削後の文章

 

The English test of the National Center Test for Universities this year continues to place emphasis on reading comprehension following the trend in the previous years. Though the level of difficulty varies widely from question to question, the average score is expected to be higher than that of last year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 4 (マウント60、1 July 04)

 

The English test of The University Testing Center Examinations continues to have a tendency to put stress on applicants' reading comprehension this year. Although there are varying degrees of difficulty depending on the questions, the average score is expected to be higher than that of last year.

 

添削

 

The English test of The University Testing Center Examinations continueds1 to have a tendency2 to put stress on applicants' reading comprehension this year. Although there are were varying degrees of difficulty depending on the questions, the average score is expected to be higher than that of last year.

 

コメント

 

1.       この日本文は大学入試センター試験が実施されたが、まだ平均点は出ていない段階でかかれたもののようですから、ここは過去形がよいでしょう。

 

2.       自然にそうなった、というより意図的に読解力を重視したので、ここでは添削のようにするとはっきりします。

 

添削後の文章

 

The English test of The University Testing Center Examinations continued to to put stress on  reading comprehension this year. Although there were varying degrees of difficulty depending on the questions, the average score is expected to be higher than that of last year.

 

読者からの投稿 3 (tama, 11 March 04)

 

The tendency focusing on reading comprehension has been continued in English test of National Center Test for University Admissions this year. The variation of difficulty level is observed in each questions, but the average will be risen up more than that of last year.

 

添削

 

The tendency focusing1 Emphasis on reading comprehension has been2 continued in the English test of the National Center Test for University Admissions this year. The variation of Variations in the in the level of3 difficulty level is was observed in each questions from question to question, but the average mark is expected will be risen up more  to be higher than that of last year.

 

コメント

 

1.       「〜の傾向が続いている」は A has continued (for a while, for two years)のようにcontinueを使うと簡単に表現できます。日本文では「傾向」が主語になっていますが、英文で日本文の内容を表現するときには、日本文の主語を英文の主語にしたらよいのか、またはもっと適当な主語があるか考える必要があります。

 

2.       「〜が今年も続いている」は一見すると受動態のようにみえますが、英文ではemphasis を主語にすると能動態で表現できます。日本文にはこのような「見かけの受動態」が多用されます。英文では能動態表現が基本になります。

 

3.       「難易」を「難易度」と補足したのがよいですね。英文では名詞を重ねてdifficulty levelとするより the level of difficulty とするのが普通です。英文では名詞を重なることを嫌います。

 

4.       本当に確実なことではないようなので、will beよりis expected to beがよいでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

Emphasis on reading comprehension has continued in the English test of the National Center for University Admissions this year. Variations in the in the level of3 difficulty was observed  from question to question but the average mark is expected to be higher than that of last year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 2(tonton, 24 June 03

 

Following the previous years the university center examination in English this year also has a tendency to place an emphasis on comprehension by reading. The questions have been chosen in varied difficulty, and in total, the average mark is expected to be higher than the one last year.

 

添削

 

Following the trend in the previous years1, the university center examination the National Centre for University Entrance Examination2 in -English this year also has a tendency to -placed an - emphasis on reading comprehension for its English examination this year too by -reading. The questions have been chosen in for varied varying difficulty3,  and in total, the average mark is expected to be higher than the one last year.

 

コメント

 

1.       「〜の傾向が今年も続いている」をFollowing the trend in the previous yearsと説明したのは良いと思います。tendencyは「自然発生的に」という感じがするので、もう少し意図的なものが感じられるtrendにしました。

 

2.       この長い名称が大学入試センターの正式名称です。日本の大学入試事情に通じている人にはthe university centre examination in Englishでもわかると思いますが、ここでは正式名称にしました。

 

3.       「問題に難易のばらつきがみられる」のは大学入試センターが意図的にしたものなのか、たまたまそうなってしまったものなのか、わかりませんが、tontonさんは意図的にしたものと解釈しています。ただし、The questions have been chosen in varied difficulty.だと、英語問題の考案者がいろいろな度合いの苦労をして問題を作った、という意味になってしまうので、The questions have been chosen for varying difficulty. 問題はいろいろな難易度を持つように選ばれた、にしました。

 

添削後の文章

 

Following the trend in the previous years, the National Centre for University Entrance Examination placed emphasis on reading comprehension for its English examination this year too. The questions have been chosen for varying difficulty and the average mark is expected to be higher than last year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 1(えり、9 Feb 03

 

The English test given by the National Center for University Entrance Examination this year has continued to place emphasis on reading comprehension. The level of difficulty varied from question to question but this year’s average mark for the English is expected to be higher than the last year’s.

 

添削

 

This year, Tthe English test given by the National Center for University Entrance Examination1 this year has continued to place emphasis on reading comprehension. The level of difficulty2 varied from question to question but this year’s average mark for the English is expected to be higher than the last year’s.

 

コメント

 

1.       「大学入試センター」のような新しい固有名詞は和英辞書に載っていないときがあります。私はこのような固有名詞を見つけるのに二つの方法を使っています。一つはhttp://www.alc.co.jp/ にある無料のオンライン辞書「英辞郎」です。この辞書は翻訳家の有志が常に新しい言葉を追加しているので便利です。また固有名詞の組織がインターネットにホームページを開いているときは英語名も入っているので、インターネットの検索エンジンに固有名詞を打ち込んで検索してみる方法もあります。

 

「大学入試センター試験の英語は読解力重視の傾向が今年も続いている。」は英文で表現するときに何を主語にするか迷いますね。えりさんのように「大学入試センター試験の英語」自体を主語にすることが出来ます。

 

2.       「問題に難易のばらつきがみられる。」も英文の主語の選択に迷います。えりさんはこの文を「難易度は問題によって変化する。」として英文で表現しています。直訳風に考えると、Variation in the level of difficulty was observed in these questions.などとしてしまい、何度も読まないと内容のわからない英文になってしまいます。

 

添削後の文章

 

This year, the English test given by the National Center for University Entrance Examination has continued to place emphasis on reading comprehension. The level of difficulty varied from question to question but this year’s average mark for English is expected to be higher than last year’s.

 

 

練習問題 23

 

寒風や霜にあたるほどに甘みがのるといわれる冬野菜。今年は例年よりも厳しい寒さが続き、とりわけおいしい白菜とホウレンソウが店頭に並んでいる。

 

読者からの投稿 22(owl, 18 December 13

 

Winter vegetables are said to get sweeter as cold winds and frosts hit them. It has been unusually colder this year, and particularly delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach are on the shelves of grocery stores.

 

添削

 

Winter vegetables are said to get sweeter as cold winds and frosts hit them. It has been unusually colder1 this year, and very particularly2 delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach are on the shelves of grocery stores.

 

コメント

コメント

 

内容のすべてがわかります。

 

1.       Unusuallyと、既に比較の意味が入っているので、coldにします。

 

2.       比較するもの(例年の冬野菜)が隠れているので、particularly ではなくveryにします。

 

添削後の文章

 

Winter vegetables are said to get sweeter as cold winds and frosts hit them. It has been unusually cold this year, and very delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach are on the shelves of grocery stores.

 

 

読者からの投稿 21(文月、7 September 13

 

It is generally believed that the more vegetables harvested in winter meet with cold wind or frost, the more delicious they become. In this year, it has been colder than in the average year and even more delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach are sold in the store.

 

添削

 

It is generally believed that the longer winter more vegetables are exposed to harvested in winter meet with cold wind or frost, the more delicious they become. This winter In this year, it has been colder than in the average year and so even more delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach are sold in the store.

 

コメント

 

the more vegetables harvested in winter meet with cold wind or frost, the more delicious they becomeの部分が分かり難いですが、意味は推測できます。

 

添削後の文章

 

It is generally believed that the longer winter vegetables are exposed to cold wind or frost, the more delicious they become. This winter, it has been colder than the average year and so even more delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach are sold in the store.

 

 

読者からの投稿 20(Valley winds, 17 March 12

 

They say that the more often winter vegetables are exposed to the cold winds and frost, the more sweet they are. Because this winter’s more severe cold than last year has been continued, very delicious Chinese cabbages and spinaches are hitting in stores.

 

添削

 

They say that the more often winter vegetables are exposed to the cold winds and frost, the more sweeter they become are. Because this winter’s has been  more severe colder than last year has been continued, very delicious Chinese cabbages and spinaches1 are available at hitting in stores.

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       Cabbageは単数、複数の二つの形で使います、spinachは物質名詞扱いで複数になりません。日本人には不思議な感覚ですが、キャベツは確かに一つ二つと数えられが、ホウレンソウは葉っぱを一枚二枚とは数えませんね。A bundle of spinach, two bundles of spinachと数えます。

 

添削語の文章

 

They say that the more often winter vegetables are exposed to cold winds and frost, the sweeter they become. Because this winter has been colder than last year, very delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach are available at stores.

 

 

読者からの投稿 19(あんこ、13 April 10

 

It is said that winter vegetables become tastier when they are exposed to cold weather and frost during winter time. This year, we had a severer winter than normal. Thanks to this weather condition, we can buy winter vegetables such as Chinese cabbage and spinach that are much tastier than usual.

 

添削

 

It is said that winter vegetables become tastier when they are exposed to cold weather winds1 and frost during the winter time. This year, the winter2 has been colder we had a severer winter than normal. Thanks to this weather condition, we can buy winter vegetables such as Chinese cabbages and spinach that are much tastier than usual.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       「寒風や霜にあたるほど」とあるでのcold winds and frostにしました。

 

2.       the winterを主語にしたほうが直截な表現でしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

It is said that winter vegetables become tastier when they are exposed to cold winds and frost during the winter. This year, the winter has been colder than normal. Thanks to this weather, we can buy winter vegetables such as Chinese cabbages and spinach that are much tastier than usual.

 

 

読者からの投稿 18(Tatsuo, 20 January 10

 

The winter vegetables are said to be gotten sweetness when they are exposed under a cold wind or frost for a long time. This year has continued many severe cold days as compared with ordinary years. So, we can find special delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach at groceries.

 

添削

 

The wWinter vegetables are said to become gotten sweetness when they are exposed to under a cold winds and or frost for a long time. This year, there have been has continued more many severe cold days than as compared with ordinary years1. So, we can find especially delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach at groceries.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の大部分はわかります。

 

1.       cold daysを使うと添削のような構文になります。内容を取って簡単にIt has been colder this year than an ordinary year.としてもよいです。

 

添削後の文章

 

Winter vegetables are said to become sweet when they are exposed to cold winds and  frost for a long time. This year, there have been more cold days than ordinary years. So, we can find especially delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach at groceries.

 

 

読者からの投稿 17(Yoshi, 13 Oct 09

 

Winter vegetables are said that they grow up in a cold window or frost, they are sweeter. This year is colder than last year, better Chinese cabbages and spinaches are lined up in the stores.

 

添削

 

Winter vegetables are said that the longer1 they grow up in the a cold window or frost, they are the sweeter they become. This year, it has been is colder than last year, and high-quality better Chinese cabbages and spinaches are lined up in the stores.

 

コメント

 

内容の概略を推測できます。

 

1.       「もっと〜すると、もっと〜になる」はこのような構造で使います。

 

添削後の文章

 

Winter vegetables are said that the longer they grow up in the cold window or frost, the sweeter they become. This year, it has been colder than last year and high-quality Chinese cabbages and spinaches are lined up in the stores.

 

 

読者からの投稿 16(mxtomi, 12 July 09

 

The more winter vegetables are exposed to chilly wind or frost, the sweeter they become. Thanks to a spell of unusually cold weather this year, we see lots of very tasty Chinese cabbages and spinach hit the store shelves.

 

添削

 

The more winter vegetables are exposed to chilly wind or frost, the sweeter they become. Thanks to a spell of unusually cold weather this year1, we see lots of very tasty Chinese cabbages and spinach on hit the store shelves.

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       a spell of cold weather this winterは今年の冬が(特に)寒い時があった、ですから、冬中いつもの年より寒かった、のではないですね。しかし、寒い時期があれば野菜はおいしくなるでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

The more winter vegetables are exposed to chilly wind or frost, the sweeter they become. Thanks to a spell of unusually cold weather this year, we see lots of very tasty Chinese cabbages and spinach on the store shelves.

 

 

読者からの投稿 15(かい、23 June 08

 

It is said that winter vegetables become ripe all the better for cold wind and frost. As it continues to be more bitterly cooler this year than others ripe Chinese cabbages and spinach in particular are displayed in a store.

 

添削

 

It is said that winter vegetables become ripe all taste the better as they are exposed to for cold wind and frosts1. As it continues to be more bitterly cooler colder this winter year than usual others, ripe and sweet Chinese cabbages and spinach in particular are being sold now at the displayed in a store2.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の概略はわかりますが、わからないところがあります。

 

1.       for cold wind and frostと文の前半の関係がわかりません。「寒風や霜にあたるほどに甘みがのる」では「もっと甘くなる」というのが要点でしょう。他の投稿でthe more, the moreの形式を使っているかたがいます。添削では「寒風や霜にあたるにつれて、もっと甘くなる」としました。

 

2.       「店頭に並んでいる」は「現在売られている」と直截な表現でよいでしょう。at the storeは「(行きつけの)店に」といった感じです。

 

添削後の文章

 

It is said that winter vegetables taste better as they are exposed to cold wind and frosts. As it continues to be colder this winter than usual, ripe and sweet Chinese cabbages and spinach  are being sold now at the store.

 

 

読者からの投稿 14(kk, 7 February 08

 

The more winter vegetables are exposed to cold wind and frost, the sweeter they become. As this winter has been much colder than the past winters, really tasty Chinese cabbages and spinach appear at greengroceries.

 

添削

 

The more winter vegetables are exposed to cold wind and frost, the sweeter they become. As this winter has been much colder than the past winters, really tasty Chinese cabbages and spinach appear at greengroceries.

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。much colder than the past winters でここ数年で一番寒い冬というのが分かりますね。

 

添削後の文章

 

添削箇所はありません。

 

 

読者からの投稿 13(dunkel, 10 November 07

 

Tastes of vegetables harvested in winter season get sweeter and sweeter when they face to severe cold wind and a frost. This year, we can find much more tasty Chinese cabbages and spinaches in a supermarket because it has been colder than the average year.

 

添削

 

Tastes of vVegetables harvested in the winter season taste1 get sweeter and sweeter as2 when they are exposed face to severe cold wind and a frost. This year, we can find much more tastyier Chinese cabbages and spinaches3 in a supermarkets because it has been colder than the average year.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       Tastes of vegetables get sweet.よりVegetables taste sweet.getより具体的な動作を示すtasteという動詞を使うとよいでしょう。

 

2.       sweeter and sweeterどんどん甘くなる、ですからas they are exposed ~ 寒風にさらされるのつれて、となります。

 

3.       キャベツは一個2個と数えられるので複数になりますが、ホウレンソウは葉っぱものなので複数形にはなるず、two bundles of spinachとなります。こんなところが英語はうるさいですね。

 

添削後の文章

 

Vegetables harvested in the winter season taste sweeter and sweeter as they are exposed  to severe cold wind and frost. This year, we can find much tastier Chinese cabbages and spinach in supermarkets because it has been colder than the average year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 12(マーチャン、27 August 07

 

The more winter vegetables are exposed to cold winds and frost, the sweeter they become. As it continues to be colder this year than usual, delicious celery cabbage and spinach are being sold at stores.

 

添削

 

The more winter vegetables are exposed to cold winds and frost, the sweeter they become. As it continues to be colder this year than usual, delicious celery cabbages and spinach are being sold at stores.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の総てがわかります。「店頭に並んでいる」をbeing sold at storesと表現したのが良いですね。

 

添削後の文章

 

The more winter vegetables are exposed to cold winds and frost, the sweeter they become. As it continues to be colder this year than usual, delicious celery cabbages and spinach are being sold at stores.

 

 

読者からの投稿 11(散歩人、16 April 07

 

In general, the longer winter vegetable is in bleak wind and under frost, the more sweat become these. As this winter has more cold days than last year, there are particular delicious celery cabbages and spinaches in markets.

 

添削

 

In general, the longer winter vegetable is are exposed to cold in bleak winds and under frost1, the sweeter they more sweat become these. As this winter has more been colder days than usual2 last year, there are particular delicious celery cabbages and spinaches3 in the markets.

 

コメント

 

1.       「寒風や霜にあたる」は「寒風や霜にさらされる」are exposed to cold winds and frostと表現するとよいでしょう。

 

2.       「今年は例年よりも厳しい寒さが続き」はThis winter has been colder than usual (years)と表現する簡単になります。

 

3.       野菜の複数形はsが付くものと付かないものがあります。cabbages, spinachです。キャベツは一つ一つが丸い独立した形をしているけれど、ほうれん草は葉っぱがたくさん生えていて畑で見るとどれが一株かわからない、といった感覚でしょうか。

 

添削後の文章

In general, the longer winter vegetable are exposed to cold winds and frost, the sweeter they  become. As this winter has been colder than usual, there are particular delicious celery cabbages and spinach in the market.

 

 

読者からの投稿 10(吉、4 December 06

 

Winter vegetables are said that the more they are exposed to cold winds and frost, the more they become sweet. This year, due to long severe cold, we can find delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach at the green grocers.

 

添削

 

It is Winter vegetables are 1said that the more they winter vegetables are exposed to cold winds and frost, the more sweeter they become sweet. This year, due to the long and severely cold winter2, we can find delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach at the green grocers3.

 

コメント

 

1.       it is said that ~という形にして主文の主語をwinter vegetablesにするとよいでしょう。「〜と言われる」は婉曲表現なので英文では省略してもよいでしょう。

 

2.       due to the long and sever cold of this wintercoldを名詞に使うこともありますが、due to the long and severely cold winterと形容詞に使ったほうが簡単でしょう。

 

3.       「店頭に並んでいる」をwe can find ~ at the green grocersと表現したのがわかりやすくてよいですね。ss

 

添削後の文章

 

It is said that the more winter vegetables are exposed to cold winds and frost, the sweeter they become. This year, due to the long and severely cold winter, we can find delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach at the green grocers.

 

 

読者からの投稿 9(Hanasaki, 22 November 06

 

Winter vegetables are said that they become sweeter by being exposed to the cold winds and the frosts. As the severe cold has lasted longer than usual this year, above all delicious Chinese cabbages and spinaches hit the store shelves.

 

添削

 

Winter vegetables are said that they become sweeter by being exposed to the cold winds and the frosts1. As the severe cold has lasted longer than usual this year winter, above all very2 delicious Chinese cabbages and spinaches3 hit the store shelves.

 

コメント

 

1.       cold windsと複数形になるのにfrostは単数形で使うという英語の決まりはどのような感覚から来ているのでしょうね。風はビュウ ビュウと一吹き、二吹き数えられるが、霜は一面に出来るので一つだ、とでも言うのでしょうか。

 

2.       「とりわけおいしい」は「例年よりもずっとおいしい」ということでしょうが、簡単にvery deliciousでよいでしょう。

 

3.       cabbagesは複数形で使えるのに、spinachは単数形という、もう一つの不思議があります。どうしてでしょうね。

 

添削後の文章

 

Winter vegetables are said that they become sweeter by being exposed to cold winds and frost. As severe cold has lasted longer than usual this winter, very delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach hit the store shelves.

 

 

読者からの投稿 8(岩ちゃん、11 November 06

 

They say that the more, winter vegetables were exposed to the cold winds and the frost, the more, they contain sweetness. As it continued to be very cold this year compared with last year, delicious celery cabbage and spinach are being sold at stores.

 

添削

 

They say1 that tThe more, winter vegetables are were exposed to the cold winds and the frost, the more sweeter, they become2 contain sweetness. As it continueds to be very colder this year than usual3 compared with last year, delicious celery cabbage and spinach are being sold at stores.

 

コメント

 

1.       「〜と言われている」は日本語の婉曲表現ですが、英文では必要ないでしょう。

 

2.       「甘みがのるといわれる冬野菜」は「冬野菜はもっと甘くなる」と言い換えると英語表現がやさしくなります。

 

3.       「例年より」は「去年より」ではなくて「いつもの年より」の意味でしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

The more winter vegetables are exposed to cold winds and frost, the sweeter they become. As it continues to be colder this year than usual, delicious celery cabbage and spinach are being sold at stores.

 

 

読者からの投稿 7(tange, 16 March 06

 

The more winter vegetables are exposed to cold window and frost, the more they are containing sugar. Because it has been colder severely through this winter than usual, in groceries you will find good quality winter vegetables, especially sweet Chinese cabbages and spinach this year.

 

添削

 

The more winter vegetables are exposed to cold window winds and frost, the more sugar they are containing sugar contain1. Because it this winter2 has been colder severely through this winter than usual, in groceries you will find good quality really tasty winter vegetables, especially sweet Chinese cabbages and spinach at grocery stores this year.

 

コメント

 

1.       なるほど寒さにあたるほど野菜は糖分を増加させるのでしたか。

 

2.       今年の冬、this winterを主語にすると文が簡単になります。気候が暑い、寒いを表現するときにitを主語にするとは限りません。

 

添削後の文章

 

The more winter vegetables are exposed to cold winds and frost, the more sugar they  contain. Because this winter has been colder than usual, you will find really tasty winter vegetables, especially Chinese cabbages and spinach at grocery stores this year.

 

 

読者からの投稿 6(rikarika, 10 August 05

 

Winter vegetables are said that the more cold wind and frost they take, the more sweetness they get. As harder cold continued this year, particularly delicious Chinese cabbage and spinach are offered in markets.

 

添削

 

Winter vegetables are said that the more colder wind and more frost they take, the more sweetness they get1. As the harder colder winter2 continued continues this year, particularly delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach are offered in the markets3.

 

コメント

 

1.       the more, the moreの構文を上手に使っていますね。

 

2.       「例年よりも厳しい寒さが続き」は「例年より寒い冬が続き」としたほうがわかりやすいでしょう。

 

3.       in the marketで「市場に」という意味になります。in marketsとすると「いくつかの市場で」となります。このときは「市場」よりもっと具体的に、at grocery storesとすると良いでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

Winter vegetables are said that the colder wind and more frost they take, the more sweetness they get. As the colder winter continues this year, particularly delicious Chinese cabbages and spinach are offered in the market.

 

 

読者からの投稿 5(かっぱん、12 April 05

 

Winter vegetables are said to become better and better as they are exposed to cold winds and frosts more. This year winter has been especially cold, so you can buy really delicious celery cabbages and spinaches.

 

添削

 

Winter vegetables are said to become better sweeter and better sweeter as they are exposed more and more to cold winds and frosts more. This year, winter has been especially cold, so you can buy really delicious celery cabbages and spinaches1.

 

コメント

 

「とりわけおいしい白菜とホウレンソウが店頭に並んでいる。」は日本語の常套表現ですが、内容をとるとかっぱんさんのように簡単に表現できますね。

 

添削後の文章

 

Winter vegetables are said to become sweeter and sweeter as they are exposed more and more to cold winds and frosts. This year, winter has been especially cold, so you can buy really delicious celery cabbages and spinaches.

 

 

読者からの投稿 4 (マウント60、1 July 04)

 

Winter vegetables are said to turn sweeter and sweeter under the influence of cold winds or frost. Because of a spell of unusually cold weather this year, we see particularly delicious Chinese cabbages and spinaches at greengrocers.

 

添削

 

Winter vegetables are said to turn sweeter and sweeter under the influence of when they are exposed to cold winds or frost. Because of a spell of unusually cold weather this year, we can get1 see particularly delicious Chinese cabbages and spinaches at greengrocers.

 

コメント

 

1.       見ているだけでなくて、買ってください。

 

添削後の文章

 

Winter vegetables are said to turn sweeter and sweeter  when they are exposed to cold winds or frost. Because of a spell of unusually cold weather this year, we can get  particularly delicious Chinese cabbages and spinaches at greengrocers.

 

 

読者からの投稿 3 (tama, 11 March 04)

 

It is said that the vegetables harvested in winter become sweeter, as they are exposed by cold wind and frost more. This year It has been colder than ever. At stores, we can find celery cabbages and spinach particularly which are especially good.

 

添削

 

It is said that the vegetables harvested in winter become sweeter sweet1, as they are exposed by to cold wind and frost more1. This year It winter2 has been colder than ever. and A at t stores, we can now find celery Chinese cabbages and spinach particularly which are especially good.

 

コメント

 

1.       英文では通常は比較級は比較の対象となるものを必要とします。たとえば、A is better than B. I like apples better than oranges.のようにです。ここではmoreが比較しているものがありません。This winter has been colder than last year.last year に相当するものがひつようです。単に添削のようにmore~を省略してよいでしょう。

 

2.       Itは天候を指す代名詞に使いますが、ここでは前の文にいろいろなものが出てきているので、それらの一つの代名詞との混乱を避けるためにwinterと明記したほうが良いです。

 

添削後の文章

 

It is said that the vegetables harvested in winter become sweet as they are exposed to cold wind and frost. This year winter has been colder than ever and at t stores we can now find Chinese cabbages and spinach which are especially good.

 

 

読者からの投稿 2(tonton, 24 June 03

 

Winter vegetables are said the more they are exposed to cold wind or frost, the more they become sweeter. Since it has been unusually cold this winter, the Chinese cabbage and the spinach at the storefronts are now exceptionally delicious.

 

添削

 

Winter vegetables are said1 Tthe more they winter vegetables are exposed to cold wind or and frost, the more sweeter they become sweeter. Since it has been unusually cold this winter, the Chinese cabbage2 and the spinach at the storefronts are now exceptionally delicious.

 

コメント

 

ごく普通の日本文ですが、英語で内容を表現しようとると、原因と結果を明確にする必要があります。tontonさんはこの因果関係に注意を払っています。

 

1.       実際に甘みが増すのでare saidはいらないと思います。日本語には「〜といわれるー、〜といわれているー」という表現が多いですが、英語で表現するときには「〜といわれてる」内容を考えて、日本語がただの婉曲表現であるときは、英語では is said, are said, they sayなどの表現を使わずに、直裁に事実を表現します。日本語の内容が「〜といわれているが、私は実際には知らない」「誰かがこういっている」という内容ならば、It is said, According to~などの表現を必要とします。

 

2.       The Chinese cabbage, the spinachは「いろいろと野菜はあるが白菜とホウレンソウという野菜の種類は」と種類を限定して強調する感じになります。「ほかにもいろいろとおいしい冬野菜があるが、たとえば白菜やホウレンソウは」という意味ならば、Chinese cabbages and spinachesと複数形で表現するのが普通です。

 

添削後の文章

 

The more winter vegetables are exposed to cold wind and frost, the sweeter they become. Since it has been unusually cold this winter, the Chinese cabbage and the spinach are now exceptionally delicious.

 

 

読者からの投稿 1(さちこ、14 Feb 03

 

It is said that vegetables taste sweeter in the winter when they are exposed to cold wind and frost . This winter has been colder than usual and we can find really good Chinese cabbages and spinaches displayed at grocery stores.

 

添削

 

It is said that1 Winter vegetables2 taste sweeter better3 in the winter when they are exposed to cold wind and frost in the field. This winter has been colder than usual and we can find really good Chinese cabbages and spinaches displayed at grocery stores.

 

コメント

 

1.       日本文では「〜といわれる」という表現が良くありますが、この文脈では「寒風や霜にあたるほど冬野菜はあまみがのる」ことは事実だとおもうので、it is said that~は省いて良いです。

 

2.       「冬野菜」は冬に旬をむかえる野菜でハウスものではなくて露地もののことだとおもいますから、winter vegetablesでよいです。

 

3.       白菜もホウレンソウもたしかに甘味がのりますが、味がよくなるという意味でbetterにしたほうが一般的な表現になります。

 

添削後の文章

 

Winter vegetables taste better when they are exposed to cold wind and frost in the field. This winter has been colder than usual and we can find really good Chinese cabbages and spinach at grocery stores.

 

 

練習問題 24

 

佐倉署は1月14日、窃盗の疑いで、市内に住む男を逮捕した。警察によると、男は妻には船橋市内の看板屋に勤めていると偽り、毎朝七時に「出勤」。主婦が買い物に出掛けて留守になる午後一時−同四時の間に空き巣に入り、午後七時には帰宅する生活を送っていた。

読者からの投稿 22(owl, 18 December 13

 

On the 14th, Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city of suspicion of theft. According to the police, he falsely told his wife that he worked for a signboard company in Funabashi, and left home for 'work' at seven every morning. He went into houses to steal things between one and four p.m., when housewives usually leave home for shopping, and got back home by seven in the evening.

 

添削

 

On the 14th, Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city of suspicion of theft. According to the police, he falsely told his wife that he worked for a signboard company in Funabashi, and left home for 'work' at seven every morning. He went into houses to steal things between one and four p.m., when housewives usually leave home for shopping, and got back home by seven in the evening.

 

コメント

 

内容のすべてがわかります。添削箇所はありません。

 

読者からの投稿 21(sasuke, 16 October 13

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of stealing. According to the police, the man told his wife a lie that he was working for a sign maker in Funabashi city and he went to work at seven every morning. While homemakers went out for shopping, the man sneaked into empty houses between 1:00 p.m. and 4:00 p.m., and he went home at 7:00 p.m.

 

添削

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of stealing theft. According to the police, the man told his wife a lie that he was working for a sign maker in Funabashi cCity and he went to work at seven every morning. While homemakers went out for shopping between 1:00 pm and 4:00 pm, the man sneaked into empty houses between 1:00 p.m. and 4:00 p.m., and he came went home at 7:00 p.m.

 

コメント

 

内容のすべてがわかります。

 

添削後の文章

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of theft. According to the police, the man told his wife a lie that he was working for a sign maker in Funabashi City and he went to work at seven every morning. While homemakers went out for shopping between 1:00 pm and 4:00 pm, the man sneaked into empty houses and he came home at 7:00 p.m.

 

 

読者からの投稿 20(文月、14 September 13

 

On 14th in this month, Sakura Police Station in Chiba Prefecture arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of theft. According to the police, the man lied to his wife and told her that he was working for a sign maker's shop in Funabashi City. The man pretended to go to work at seven every morning. He committed housebreaking from one to four o'clock, when many housewives go to shopping and houses are empty, and usually went home at seven in the evening.

 

添削

 

On the14th of in this month, Sakura Police Station in Chiba Prefecture arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of theft. According to the police, the man lied to his wife and told her that he was working for a sign maker's shop in Funabashi City. The man pretended to go to work at seven every morning. He committed housebreaking from one to four o'clock in the afternoon, when many housewives went go to shopping and their houses were are empty, and usually returned went home at seven in the evening.

 

コメント

 

内容のすべてがわかります。

 

添削後の文章

 

On the14th of this month, Sakura Police Station in Chiba Prefecture arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of theft. According to the police, the man lied to his wife that he was working for a sign maker's shop in Funabashi City. The man pretended to go to work at seven every morning. He committed housebreaking from one to four o'clock in the afternoon when many housewives went shopping and their houses were empty, and usually returned  home at seven in the evening.

 

 

読者からの投稿 19(Valley winds, 27 March 12

 

The 14th, Sakura Police Station arrested a man on suspicion of stealing, who live downtown. According to the police, the man told a lie to his wife that he worked for a sign maker in Funabashi City and ‘went to work’ at 7 every morning. He used to have stolen in an empty home between 1:00 pm and 4:00 pm, when many housewives had gone out shopping, and to get home by seven.

 

添削

 

On Tthe 14th of January, the Sakura Police Station in the City of Sakura1 arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of stealing, who live downtown. According to the police, the man told a lie to his wife that he worked for a sign maker in Funabashi City and ‘went to work’ at 7 o’clock2 every morning. He broke into used to have stolen in an empty home between 1:00 pm and 4:00 pm, when many housewives had gone out shopping., and to He came3 get home by seven o’clock in the evening..

 

コメント

 

内容の大部分はわかりますが、He used to have stolen in an empty home.のところがわかりません。

 

1.       the Sakura Police Station だけでは佐倉市の警察署とは分かり難いので添削のようにするとよいでしょう。

 

2.       会話では” See you at seven in the morning.”と言いますが、文章では “I saw him at seven o’clock in the morning. I saw him 7:00 am.とします。

 

3.       ここから新しい文にするとわかりやすくなります。

 

添削後の文章

 

On the 14th of January, the Sakura Police Station in the City of Sakura arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of stealing. According to the police, the man told a lie to his wife that he worked for a sign maker in Funabashi City and ‘went to work’ at 7 o’clock every morning. He broke into an empty home between 1:00 pm and 4:00 pm when many housewives had gone out shopping. He came t home by seven o’clock in the evening..

 

 

読者からの投稿 18(あんこ、18 April 10

 

The Police Department of Sakura City arrested a man for burglary on fourteenth. The Police said that this man lived with his wife in Sakura City and lied to his wife that he worked for a sign maker in Funabashi City. He pretended to leave for work at seven in the morning and came home by seven in the evening. Every day, he waited until one in the afternoon because he knew that home makers usually went to grocery store and did not come back home until four o'clock. During these hours, he broke into empty houses and stole valuables.

 

添削

 

The Police Department of Sakura City arrested a man for burglary on January the fourteenth. The Ppolice1 said that this man lived with his wife in Sakura City and lied to his wife that he worked for a sign maker in Funabashi City. He pretended to leave for work at seven in the morning and came home by seven in the evening. Every day, he waited until one in the afternoon because he knew that housewives home makers usually went out to grocery shopping store and did not come back home until four o'clock. During these hours, he broke into empty houses and stole valuables.

 

コメント

 

日本文の内容を一度整理してから英文で表現してあるので、わかりやすい文章になっています。

 

1.       The Police Department of Sakura Cityの省略としてthe Policeとしたのでしょうが、ここではthe police (警察一般のいみですが、文脈かから佐倉警察署だとわかります)でよいでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

The Police Department of Sakura City arrested a man for burglary on January the fourteenth. The police said that this man lived with his wife in Sakura City and lied to his wife that he worked for a sign maker in Funabashi City. He pretended to leave for work at seven in the morning and came home by seven in the evening. Every day, he waited until one in the afternoon because he knew that housewives usually went out to grocery shopping and did not come back home until four o'clock. During these hours, he broke into empty houses and stole valuables.

 

 

読者からの投稿 17(Tatsuo, 22 January 10

 

The Police station of Sakura announced that a man, who lives in the downtown, was arrested by the police for theft. According to the Police, the man lied to his wife working for a signage company in Funahashi city and he left home at seven every morning. He usually carried out theft between 1 p.m. and 4 p.m. Because most of housewives were going shopping in this term and many houses were nobody in. After that he had constantly gone back his house by 7pm every day.

 

添削

 

The Police sStation of the City of Sakura announced that a man, who livesd in the city downtown, was arrested on suspicion by the police for theft. According to the Ppolice, the man lied to his wife saying that he was working for a signage company in Funahashi cCity. and hHe1 left home at seven o’clock every morning. He usually broke into houses carried out theft between 1 p.m. and 4 p.m. Bbecause most of housewives were going shopping during in this term and at many houses were nobody was at home in. After that he had constantly punctually came home gone back his house by 7 p.m.2 every day.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       ここから後はこの泥棒の日常生活の記述なので、ここから新しい文にするとよいでしょう。

 

2.       現在では7 pm, 7 p.m. のどちらの記述法でもよいですが、文章中にすでに1 p.m.という記述法を使っているので、これに合わせます。

 

添削後の文章

 

The Police Station of the City of Sakura announced that a man who lived in the city was arrested on suspicion theft. According to the police, the man lied to his wife saying that he was working for a signage company in Funahashi City. He left home at seven o’clock every morning. He usually broke into houses between 1 p.m. and 4 p.m. because most housewives were going shopping during this term and at many houses nobody was at home. After that he punctually came home by 7 p.m. every day.

 

 

読者からの投稿 16(Yoshi, 26 October 09

 

A man living in Funabashi was arrested on suspicious of theft by police in Sakura station on 14th. According to the police, the man lied to his wife that he was working in sign making store in the Funabashi and leaving the house at 7. The man was sneaking into houses and stealing something from 1pm to 4pm, during the time wives were out of the houses, and went back to the home.

 

添削

 

A man living in Funabashi was arrested on suspiciousn of theft by police in the Sakura Police sStation on the14th of this month. According to the police, the man lied to his wife that he was working in a sign making store in the Funabashi and left home leaving the house at 7 seven o’clock in the morning1. The man sneaked was sneaking into houses and stole variable things stealing something from  between 1pm and to 4pm o’clock in the afternoon, when during the time housewives were out of their houses., The man came and went back to the home by seven o’clock in the evening.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       in the morning, in the afternoon, in the eveningと三つ揃えると時間の経過がわかり、この泥棒の規則正しい生活の面白さが読者に伝わります。

 

添削後の文章

 

A man living in Funabashi was arrested on suspicion of theft by the Sakura Police Station on the14th of this month. According to the police, the man lied to his wife that he was working in a sign making store in Funabashi and left home seven o’clock in the morning. The man sneaked into houses and stole variable things between 1 and 4 o’clock in the afternoon when housewives were out of their houses. The man came home by seven o’clock in the evening.

 

 

読者からの投稿 15(mxtomi, 12 July 09

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested on the 14th a man living in the city on charge of theft. The police say the suspect misled his wife into believing that he worked for a sign maker in Funabashi city. He went to “work” seven o’clock every morning and got home by seven in the evening. Actually however, he broke into houses for money between one and four in the afternoon when housewives routinely left home for shopping.

 

添削

 

On January 14, Tthe Sakura Police Station arrested on the 14th a man living in the city on charge of theft. The police say that the suspect misled his wife into believing that he worked for a sign maker in Funabashi cCity. He went to “work” at seven o’clock every morning and got home by seven in the evening. Actually, however, he broke into houses for money between one and four in the afternoon when housewives usually routinely went out left home for shopping.

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。

 

添削後の文章

 

On January 14, the Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city on charge of theft. The police say that the suspect misled his wife into believing that he worked for a sign maker in Funabashi City. He went to “work” at seven o’clock every morning and got home by seven in the evening. Actually, however, he broke into houses between one and four in the afternoon when housewives usually went out for shopping.

 

 

読者からの投稿 14(かい、21 July 08

 

The Sakura Police arrested the man in Sakura for theft on 14th. According to the police, he told his wife that he had been working at an sign maker in Funabashi ,and he” went to work” at 7 AM every morning. Actually, however, he had intruded into somebody else’s' house from 1PM to 4PM after housewife went shopping ,and came back home on 7PM.

 

添削

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested the a man in Sakura City on suspicion of for theft on January 14th. According to the police, he told his wife that he was1 had been working at an sign maker in Funabashi .,and he He “went to work” at 7 AM every morning. Actually, however, he broke had intruded into somebody elses' houses from 1PM to 4PM after while housewife housewives went shopping ,and came back home on at 7PM.

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       ここはこの男が妻に伝えた内容なのでtoldと同じ時制がよいでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man in Sakura City on suspicion of theft on January 14th. According to the police, he told his wife that he was working at an sign maker in Funabashi. He “went to work” at 7 AM every morning. Actually, he broke into houses from 1PM to 4PM while housewives went shopping and came home at 7PM.

 

 

読者からの投稿 13(kk, 8 February 08

 

The Sakura Police arrested a man who lived in Sakura City on suspicion of theft on the fourteenth of this month. According to the police announcement, the suspect had been lying to his wife that he was working for a sign maker in Funabashi City and would go to work at seven every morning. He broke into empty houses while housewives were going shopping away from home between one and four in the afternoon and after the theft, he would come home from usual work at around seven in the evening as if nothing had happened.

 

添削

 

The police in Sakura City Police arrested a man who lived in Sakura City on suspicion of theft on the fourteenth of this month. According to the police announcement, the suspect had been lying to his wife that he was working for a sign maker in Funabashi City and would1 go to work at seven every morning. In fact, Hhe broke into empty houses while housewives were going went shopping away from home between one and four in the afternoon. and after the theft, he He came2 would come home from his “work” usual work at around seven in the evening as if nothing had happened3.

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。文意からわかる内容を省略しました。

 

1.       ここでは妻に「(看板屋の)仕事に行ってくるよ。」と言ったのでwould go to workが適切ですね。

 

2.       ここでは「帰宅した」という事実を述べているだけなので、he came home します。空き巣が実際の仕事なのでhis “work” として偽りの仕事と区別しました。

 

3.       as if nothing had happened が情景が見えるようでいいですね。

 

添削後の文章

 

The police in Sakura City arrested a man who lived in Sakura City on suspicion of theft on the fourteenth of this month. According to the police, the suspect had been lying to his wife that he was working for a sign maker in Funabashi City and would go to work at seven every morning. In fact, he broke into empty houses while housewives went shopping between one and four in the afternoon. He came home from his “work” at around seven in the evening as if nothing had happened.

 

 

読者からの投稿 12(dunkel, 16 November 07

 

Police in Sakura city arrested a man who lived in the city. He was suspected as a thief. The police announced that he told a lie to his wife that he worked at a sign maker in Funabashi. He left his home at seven in the morning everyday and returned until seven in the evening. In fact, he worked as a thief from one p.m. to four p.m. when housewives usually went out for shopping.

 

添削

 

The Ppolice in Sakura cCity arrested a man who lived in the city. He was suspected as a thief. The police announced that he told a lie to his wife that he worked at a sign maker in Funabashi. He left his home at seven in the morning and returned home everyday and returned until by seven in the evening everyday. During the day, however, In fact, he worked as a thief breaking into houses between from one p.m. to and four p.m. when housewives usually went out for shopping.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の総てがわかります。he worked as a thiefという表現が面白いです、「空き巣をして」と説明を入れるとよいでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

The police in Sakura City arrested a man who lived in the city. He was suspected as a thief. The police announced that he told a lie to his wife that he worked at a sign maker in Funabashi. He left his home at seven in the morning and returned home by seven in the evening everyday. During the day, however, he worked as a thief breaking into houses between one and four p.m. when housewives usually went out for shopping.

 

 

 

読者からの投稿 11(マーチャン、27 August 07

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of theft on October 14. According to the police station, the man deceived his wife telling her that he worked for a signboard shop in Funabashi City. He left home for work at seven o'clock every morning. He broke into houses between 1:00 p.m. and 4:00 p.m. when housewives went shopping and were not at home. He returned home by seven o'clock in the evening. He led such a life every day.

 

添削

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of theft on October 14. According to the police station, the man deceived his wife telling her that he worked for a signboard shop in Funabashi City. He left home for work at seven o'clock every morning, . He broke into houses between 1:00 p.m. and 4:00 p.m. when housewives went shopping, and were not at home. He returned home by seven o'clock in the evening. He led such a life every day.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の総てがわかります。わかりやすい文章にするために一般的には文を短くしますが、ここでは添削のように続けると、一連の挙動がよくわかると思います。

 

添削後の文章

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of theft on October 14. According to the police, the man deceived his wife telling her that he worked for a signboard shop in Funabashi City. He left home for work at seven o'clock every morning,  broke into houses between 1:00 p.m. and 4:00 p.m. when housewives went shopping, and  returned home by seven o'clock in the evening. He led such a life every day.

 

 

読者からの投稿 10(散歩人、16 April 07

 

Detectives of the Sakura police station arrested a man who lives in Sakura city for the theft. According to police, the man told his wife a lie that he worked for a sign maker of Funabashi city, and came to work every morning at seven o'clock. He was a sneak thief who intruded into an empty house whose housewife went out from 1:00 to 4:00 p.m and came home at 7:00 p.m.

 

添削

 

Detectives of tThe Sakura pPolice sStation1 arrested a man who livesd2 in Sakura cCity on charge of for the theft3. According to the police4, the man told his wife a lie that he worked for a sign maker of in Funabashi cCity, and went came to work every morning at seven o'clock. He was in fact 5a sneak thief who intruded into an empty houses between 1:00 to 4:00 pm6 when the whose housewifeves went out for shopping from 1:00 to 4:00 p.m and. He7 came home at 7:00 p.m.

 

コメント

 

1.       実際は佐倉署の警察官がこの人を逮捕したのでしょうが、「佐倉署が逮捕した」でよいでしょう。a detectiveはこの文脈では「刑事」という階級の警察官を指します。

 

2.       窃盗犯の家は現在も佐倉市にあるでしょうが、英文では主動詞の時制(この場合はarrestedという過去形)に対応してlivedと過去形になります。

 

3.       「窃盗の疑いで」とあるとおり、警察で逮捕した段階では「疑い」があるだけでまだ犯罪は確定していないのでon charge of theftという表現をします。

 

4.       「警察」は従来はthe policeと定冠詞を付けましたが、このごろは単にpoliceと表記する場合が増えています。

 

5.       「(この人は看板屋ではなく、実は)」とすると、前の文とのつながりがよくなります。

 

6.       多分、何軒もこそ泥に入ったのでしょうからhousesと複数にします。an empty houseは「空き家」で人が住んでいない家の意味になります。またintruded into houses from 1:00 to 4:00 pmは、午後一時から4時まで空き巣に入りっぱなし、という感じになるので、between 1:00 to 4:00 pm 「午後一時から四時の間に(何回か入ったり出たり)」としました。

 

7.       housewives went out for shopping and came home at 7:00 pmと続いて読む可能性もあるので、ここで新しく文を始めて、He came home at 7:00 pm.と誰が帰宅したのか明確にします。

 

添削後の文章

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man who lived in Sakura City on charge of theft. According to the police, the man told his wife a lie that he worked for a sign maker in Funabashi City, and went to work every morning at seven o'clock. He was in fact a sneak thief who intruded into houses between 1:00 to 4:00 pm when the housewives went out for shopping. He came home at 7:00 p.m.

 

 

読者からの投稿 9(吉、5 December 06

 

A man living within Sakura city was arrested by Sakura Police station on charges of theft on 14th. According to the Police, the man deceived his wife by telling that he worked for a sign painter in Funabashi city. He pretended to leave for work at seven every morning. Then he sneak-thieved during one to four PM when housewives usually go out for shopping and went back home at seven everyday.

 

添削

 

A man living within in Sakura cCity was arrested by Sakura Police station on charges of theft on January14th. According to the Ppolice1, the man deceived his wife by telling her that he was workeding2 for a sign painter in Funabashi cCity. He pretended to leave for work at seven every morning. Then he sneak-thieved broke in houses during from one to four PM in the afternoon3 when housewives usually go went out for shopping. He4 came and went back home at seven in the evening everyday.

 

コメント

 

1.       Sakura Policeは固有名詞で、the policeは警察一般を指す普通名詞です。ここではthe policeで佐倉警察署とわかります。

 

2.       このような場合は、現在働いている、ということを強調して進行形で表現することが多いです。

 

3.       during three hours from one to four in the afternoon のようにduring AA のところに時間の長さを示す名詞句が来ます。from 1:00 to 4:00 pm, またはfrom one to four in the afternoonが一般的です。from one to four pmという組み合わせは見かけません。

 

4.       ここから新しい文にすると came home の主語がはっきりします。

 

添削後の文章

 

A man living in Sakura City was arrested by Sakura Police station on charges of theft on January14th. According to the police, the man deceived his wife by telling her that he was working for a sign painter in Funabashi City. He pretended to leave for work at seven every morning. Then he broke in houses from one to four in the afternoon when housewives usually went out for shopping. He came home at seven in the evening everyday.

 

 

読者からの投稿 8(岩ちゃん、11 November 06

 

The Sakura police station arrested a man living in the city for theft on October 14. According to the police station, to deceive his wife, the man always told her that he worked for a signboard shop in Funabashi City. He left home for work at seven o'clock every morning. He thieved in their house between 1:00 p.m. and 4:00 p.m. when housewives were not at home to go shopping. After that he returned home by seven o'clock in the afternoon. He led such a life every day.

 

添削

 

The Sakura pPolice sStation1 arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of for theft on October 14. According to the police station, to deceive his wife2, the man always told her deceived his wife telling her that he worked for a signboard shop in Funabashi City. He left home for work at seven o'clock every morning. He broke into thieved in their houses between 1:00 p.m. and 4:00 p.m. when housewives went shopping3 and were not at home to go shopping. After that hHe returned home by seven o'clock in the evening afternoon. He led such a life every day.

 

コメント

 

1.       大文字で固有名詞にします。

 

2.       文頭に主語が来るほうが内容がわかりやすくなるので添削のようにしました。

 

3.       時間の順序に従ってthey went shopping and were not at homeとするとわかりやすくなります

 

添削後の文章

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of theft on October 14. According to the police station, the man deceived his wife telling her that he worked for a signboard shop in Funabashi City. He left home for work at seven o'clock every morning. He broke into houses between 1:00 p.m. and 4:00 p.m. when housewives went shopping and were not at home. He returned home by seven o'clock in the evening. He led such a life every day.

 

 

読者からの投稿 7(tange, 25 March 06

 

The Sakura Police Department arrested a man living in the city, suspecting of burglary on the 14th. According to the police, the suspect deceived his wife that he had been working for a sign painter in Funabashi City and left home at 7 o’clock every morning. He used to burglar houses when house wives left for shopping between 1 to 4 pm and go home around 7.

 

添削

 

The Sakura Police Department arrested a man living in the city, suspecting on suspicion1 of burglary on January the 14th. According to the police, the suspect deceived his wife that he had been working2 for a sign painter in Funabashi City and left home at 7 o’clock every morning. He used to burglar break in houses when house wives left for shopping between 1 to 4 pm and go home around 7 pm.

 

コメント

 

1.       The police caught a man trying to break in a house.ならこそ泥の現行犯逮捕ですが、The police arrested a man suspecting of burglary.とするとsuspectする主体が警察かこの男(内容からはありえないことですが)か曖昧な感じになります。

 

2.       deceived(過去)の以前にずっとですからはhad been working ですね。時間関係がよくわかります。

 

添削後の文章

 

The Sakura Police Department arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of burglary on January the 14th. According to the police, the suspect deceived his wife that he had been working for a sign painter in Funabashi City and left home at 7 o’clock every morning. He used to break in houses when house wives left for shopping between 1 to 4 pm and go home around 7 pm.

 

 

読者からの投稿 6(rikarika, 10 August 05

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of theft. According to the station, the man has led the life: every day went out at 7am with saying his wife falsely working at a paint shop in Funabashi city, made theft from 1pm to 4pm while many housewives left home for shopping and after that went back home at 7pm.

 

添削

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of theft. According to the station police, the man has led the a curious life1: every day he2 went out at 7am with saying to his wife falsely that he was3 working at a paint shop in Funabashi cCity, made theft broke into houses from between 1pm to and 4pm4 while many housewives left home for shopping, and after that went back came home at 7pm.

 

コメント

 

1.       コロンで文をつないで補足説明をする、というのは良いアイディアですね。the man has led the life:とすると読者がこの人の生活を知っていることになってしまうので、the man has led a curious life: ~として「この男はおかしな生活をしていた、それは 〜」とするとよいでしょう。

 

2.       コロンの後の文の主語を入れます。

 

3.       saying to his wife falsely working at a paint shopですと、working の主語がhis wifeになってしまいます。saying to his wife that he was workingと妻に言った話の内容をthat節にします。

 

4.       from 1 pm to 4 pmとすると「午後1時から4時までずっと空き巣の入りっぱなし」になるのでbetween 1 pm and 4 pm 「午後1時から4時までの間に、あちこと空き巣をしていた」がよいでしょう

 

添削後の文章

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city on suspicion of theft. According to the police, the man has led a curious life: every day he went out at 7am saying to his wife falsely that he was working at a paint shop in Funabashi City, broke into houses between 1pm and 4pm while many housewives left home for shopping, and came home at 7pm.

 

 

読者からの投稿 5(かっぱん、12 April 04

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in Sakura City on charge of larceny on January 14. According to the Police, the man lied his wife that he worked for a sign painter in Funabashi City. Every morning he left for “work” at seven, broke into houses between one to four, when housewives often go shopping and many houses become absent, and came back his home at seven.

 

添削

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in Sakura City on charge of larceny on January 14. According to the Police, the man lied to his wife that he worked for a sign painter in Funabashi City1. Every morning he left for “work” at seven, broke into houses between one to and four,2 when housewives often go went shopping and many left their houses become absent, and came back his home at seven.

 

コメント

 

1.       日本文は長々と続くので、英文で表現するときには適当なところで文を分ける必要があります。ここのところは良い区切りですね。

 

2.       いくつかの事柄がひとつの文の中にあるので、ここはコンマを取り前との関連を密接にしたほうがよいです。

 

添削後の文章

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in Sakura City on charge of larceny on January 14. According to the Police, the man lied to his wife that he worked for a sign painter in Funabashi City. Every morning he left for “work” at seven, broke into houses between one and four2 when housewives often went shopping and left their houses absent, and came home at seven.

 

 

読者からの投稿 4 (マウント60、1 July 04)

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city on charges of theft on the 14th.  According to the investigation by the police, he lied to his wife about his occupation, telling her that he was working for a sign painter in Funabashi City. He left for "work" at 7:00 a.m. every day, sneaked into other peoples' residents to steal between 1:00 p.m. and 4:00 p.m., when housewives were out for shopping, and came home at 7:00 p.m. This is how he led his everyday life.

 

添削

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city on charges of theft on the 14th.  According to the investigation by the police, he lied1 to his wife about his occupation, telling her that he was working for a sign painter in Funabashi City. Every day, Hhe left for "work" at 7:00 a.m. every day, sneaked into broke into2 other peoples' residents to steal between 1:00 p.m. and 4:00 p.m., when housewives were out for shopping, and came home at 7:00 p.m. This is how he led his everyday life.

 

コメント

 

1.       lieには、嘘を言う、という意味が含まれているので、省略できます。

 

2.       こそ泥にはbreak-in という名詞が良く使われます。手口はいろいろあって、いつもガラス窓を壊して家に侵入するわけではないでしょうが。

 

添削後の文章

 

The Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in the city on charges of theft on the 14th.  According to the investigation by the police, he lied to his wife that he was working for a sign painter in Funabashi City. Every day, he left for "work" at 7:00 a.m. every day, broke into other peoples' residents between 1:00 p.m. and 4:00 p.m. when housewives were out for shopping, and came home at 7:00 p.m.

 

 

読者からの投稿 3 (tama, 19 March 04)

 

On March fourteenth, Police in Sakura City arrested the man who lived in this city on the suspicion of theft. According to the report by Police, he told a lie that he worked for an advertising display store in Funabashi city. Every day, he went to work at seven in the morning, broke in houses between one and four when housewives went shopping and came home by seven in the evening.

 

添削

 

On March fourteenth, Ppolice in Sakura City arrested the a1 man who lived in this city on the2 suspicion of theft. According to the report by Ppolice, he told a lie to his wife3 that he worked for an advertising display store in Funabashi cCity. Every day, he went to work4 at seven in the morning, broke in into houses between one and four in the afternoon5 when housewives went shopping, and came home by seven in the evening.

 

コメント

 

tamaさんは日本文の内容をわかりやすく、読みやすく英文で表現しています。

 

1.       初めて文章に登場するので不定冠詞です。

 

2.       On suspicion ofは熟語なのでthe は省略されます。

 

3.       「妻に嘘をついていた」ということがこの記事の中で大切なので添削のようにします。

 

4.       「仕事」の中身が問題なので “work”とすると良いでしょう。

 

5.       In the afternoonは無くても内容はわかりますが、この男はこの種の仕事を通常行う午前1時と4時の間ではなくて、午後1時から4時というところも大切なので添削のようにします。

 

添削後の文章

 

On March fourteenth, police in Sakura City arrested a man who lived in this city on suspicion of theft. According to the report by police, he told a lie to his wife that he worked for an advertising display store in Funabashi City. Every day, he went to “work” at seven in the morning, broke into houses between one and four in the afternoon when housewives went shopping, and came home by seven in the evening.

 

 

読者からの投稿 2(tonton, 8 Aug 03

 

On the fourteenth a man who lives in Sakura City was arrested on suspicion of theft by the Sakura City Police Department. According to the police the man had been lying to his wife that he was working at a sign painter in Funabashi City. His daily routine was to go to "work" at seven o'clock in the morning, break into houses between one to four o'clock in the afternoon which many house wives are absent for shopping, then come home by seven o'clock in the evening.

 

添削

 

On the fourteenth of January, a man who lives lived1 in Sakura City was arrested on suspicion of theft by the Sakura City Police Department. According to the police the man had been lying2 to his wife that he was working at a sign painter in Funabashi City. His daily routine was to go to "work3" at seven o'clock in the morning, break into in houses between one to and four o'clock in the afternoon which when many house wives are were absent for shopping, then come home by seven o'clock in the evening.

 

コメント

 

1.       逮捕された男はこの記事の時点で佐倉市に住んでいるのでlivesとしたくなりますが、逮捕されたのが過去なので英文の時制の一致でlivedになります。

 

2.       日本文の2番目と3番目の文は内容がつながっていて、「毎朝七時に出勤。」と句点がついていますが、内容は読点ですね。英文で表現するときにはどこで内容を切るか工夫が必要ですが、tontonさんは上手に内容を分けて、二つの英文にしています。the man had been lying to his wife…は(逮捕されるまで)ずっと妻に嘘をついていた、という感じが出ていて良いと思います。

 

3.       His daily routine was to go to “work”…以下も、毎日〜する生活を送っていた、という日本文の雰囲気がでています。単に内容だけを英文で表現するならば、投稿1のように Every day he went to “work” at seven o’clock in the morning, broke in houses…となります。

 

添削後の文章

 

On the fourteenth of January, a man who lived in Sakura City was arrested on suspicion of theft by the Sakura City Police Department. According to the police the man had been lying to his wife that he was working at a sign painter in Funabashi City. His daily routine was to go to "work" at seven o'clock in the morning, break in houses between one and four o'clock in the afternoon when many house wives were absent for shopping, then come home by seven o'clock in the evening.

 

 

読者からの投稿 1(さちこ、9 Feb 03

 

On January 14, the Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in Sakura on suspicion of theft. According to the police, the man lied to his wife that he worked for a sign making store in Funabashi. Every day he left home at seven o’clock in the morning, broke in houses between one and four in the afternoon when housewives went shopping, and came home by seven o’clock in the evening.

 

添削

 

On January 14, the Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in Sakura on suspicion of theft. According to the police, the man lied to his wife by telling her1 that he worked for a sign- making store in Funabashi. Every day he left home at seven o’clock in the morning2, broke into houses between one and four in the afternoon when housewives went shopping, and came home by seven o’clock in the evening.

 

コメント

 

1.       The man lied to his wife that~は「妻をだました」でいろいろなだまし方が考えられます。「嘘を言った」はThe man told a lie to his wife that~となります。ここではthe man lied to his wife by telling her that~としました。

 

2.       日本文では「〜毎朝七時に出勤。」で文が切れていますが、内容から考えて、さちこさんのように、「毎朝七時に出勤、午後一時−同四時の間に空き巣、午後七時には帰宅」と一つの文の中で表現すると内容が面白くなります。

 

添削後の文章

 

On January 14, the Sakura Police Station arrested a man living in Sakura on suspicion of theft. According to the police, the man lied to his wife by telling her that he worked for a sign- making store in Funabashi. Every day he left home at seven o’clock in the morning, broke into houses between one and four in the afternoon when housewives went shopping, and came home by seven o’clock in the evening.

 

 

練習問題 25

 

神奈川県では地下千メートル以上を掘削する大深度温泉の開発がブームだが、すでに、県内の一部で資源枯渇の兆候が表れている。

 

読者からの投稿 21(owl, 21 December 13

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, developing hot springs deep underground by digging more than 1,000 meters into the ground has become quite popular recently. However, there are already some signs that the resources are drying out in some parts of the prefecture.

 

添削

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, developing hot springs deep underground by digging more than 1,000 meters into the ground has become quite popular recently. However, there are already some signs that the resources are drying out in some parts of the prefecture.

 

コメント

 

内容のすべてがわかります。添削箇所はありません。

 

読者からの投稿 20(sasuke, 27 October 13

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, development of deep hot springs by digging away more than 1,000 meters underground is a craze, but in some places inside the prefecture, the sign of resource depletion has already appeared.

 

添削

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, the development of deep hot springs by digging down away more than 1,000 meters underground is booming a craze, .bBut in some areas places inside in the prefecture, the signs of resource depletion have has already appeared.

 

コメント

 

内容のすべてがわかります。

 

添削後の文章

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, the development of deep hot springs by digging down more than 1,000 meters underground is booming. But in some areas in the prefecture, signs of resource depletion have already appeared.

 

 

読者からの投稿 19(文月、15 September 13

 

Kanagawa Prefecture is undergoing a boom in the development of deep subterranean hot springs, digging more than thousand meters underground. By now, however, there are signs of resource depletion in some areas of the prefecture.

 

添削

 

Kanagawa Prefecture is undergoing a boom in the development of deep subterranean hot springs, digging more than thousand meters into the ground underground. By now, however, there are signs of resource depletion in some areas of the prefecture.

 

コメント

 

内容のすべてがわかります。

 

1.       添削のほうが地表から地下千メートルのところまで掘り下げている、ということがはっきりします。

 

添削後の文章

 

Kanagawa Prefecture is undergoing a boom in the development of deep subterranean hot springs, digging more than thousand meters into the ground. By now, however, there are signs of resource depletion in some areas of the prefecture.

 

 

読者からの投稿 18(Valley winds, 27 March 12

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, the development of very deep hot spring is booming, which boring a hole to a depth of over one thousand meters. As a result, there are beginning to be manifested by signs of resource depletion in some regions of the Prefecture.

 

添削

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, the development of very deep hot springs is booming, which boring bores a hole to a depth of over one thousand meters. As a result, there are already beginning to be manifested by1 signs of resource depletion in some regions of the Prefecture.

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       日本文では「資源枯渇の兆候が表れている」と難しい表現になっていますが、英文では日本文の意味をとって簡単な英語表現にするのがよいでしょう。この添削講座では日本文の内容を正確に英文で表現することに重点を置きますが、日本文の内容を日本文に一番近い英語表現(例えば逐語訳風なもの)にすることを目的にしていません。

 

添削後の文章

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, the development of very deep hot springs is booming, which bores a hole to a depth of over one thousand meters. As a result, there are already signs of resource depletion in some regions of the Prefecture.

 

 

読者からの投稿 17(あんこ、22 April 10

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, digging the ground deeper than one thousand meter to find a source of hot springs is in the boom. However, this development has influenced some part of Kanagawa, showing a sign of a decline in the level of the groundwater.

 

添削

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, digging the ground deeper than one thousand meters to find a source of hot springs is in the boom. However, this development has influenced some part of Kanagawa, showing a sign of a decline in the level of the groundwater.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の総てがわかります。「資源枯渇の兆候」を具体的に説明していますね。

 

添削後の文章

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, digging the ground deeper than one thousand meters to find a source of hot springs is in the boom. However, this development has influenced some part of Kanagawa, showing a sign of a decline in the level of the groundwater.

 

 

読者からの投稿 16(Tatsuo, 22 Jan 10

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, it is a boom to develop a deeply excavated hot spring which is excavated over 1,000 meters. However, some of resources have already appeared to exhaust in a part of Kanagawa Prefecture.

 

添削

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, it is a boom to develop a deeply excavated hot spring which is excavated over1 1,000 meters. However, some of resources have already appeared to exhaust2 in a part of Kanagawa Prefecture.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の大部分はわかりますが、二番目の文はわかり難いです。

 

1.       which節は少しくどい感じがするので、添削のように説明句にしました。

 

2.       He appears to be exhausted. 彼は疲れ果てているように見える。

He appears to have been exhausted. 彼は疲れ切ってしまっているように見える。

というような語順になります。

 

コメント

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, it is a boom to develop a deeply excavated hot spring, sometimes deeper than 1,000 meters into the ground. However, deep hot spring water appears to have already been exhausted in some parts of Kanagawa Prefecture.

 

 

読者からの投稿 15(Yoshi, 3 November 09

 

Although Digging at more than thousand meters the surface of the ground and development of hot springs is starting boom in Kanagawa prefecture, it already shows some signs of the natural resource depletion in a part of the Kanagawa.

 

添削

 

Although Digging at more than one thousand meters the surface of into the ground and developmenting of hot springs is starting booming in Kanagawa pPrefecture1,. However, it already shows some signs of the natural resource depletion of underground hot water2 in a part of the Kanagawa prefecture.

 

コメント

 

Digging at more than thousand meters the surface of the groundのところの概略はわかりますが内容がはっきりしません。

 

1.       ここから新しい文にしたほうが読みやすいでしょう。

 

2.       日本文には「資源枯渇」とありますが、ここでは地下の温水源のことなので、具体的に書くとよいでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

Digging more than one thousand meters into the ground and developing hot springs is  booming in Kanagawa Prefecture. However, it already shows some signs of the depletion of underground hot water in a part of the prefecture.

 

 

読者からの投稿 14(mxtomi, 12 July 09

 

The development of hot springs deeper than 1,000 meters has been booming in Kanagawa Prefecture, but in some parts of the prefecture, indications of the resource depletion are beginning to show up.

 

添削

 

The development of hot springs deeper than 1,000 meters in the ground1 has been booming in Kanagawa Prefecture., but iIn some parts of the prefecture2, however, indications of the resource depletion of underground hot water3 are beginning to show up.

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。

 

1.       おまけのようですが、これを入れると内容がわかりやすくなり、また文にリズムがでます。

 

2.       前の文の内容と異なる(ブームはプラス、資源枯渇はマイナスといった感じです)ので、ここから新しい文にすると印象がつよくなります。

 

3.       短い文章ですが、このような説明があるほうが読みやすいでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

The development of hot springs deeper than 1,000 meters in the ground has been booming in Kanagawa Prefecture. In some parts of the prefecture, however, indications of the depletion of underground hot water are beginning to show up.

 

 

添削後の文章 13(かい、6 Aug 08

 

Developments of hot springs that excavate under the ground more than 1,000 meters are actively conducted in Kanagawa Prefecture. However, the sign of being short of resources has already appeared in a part of the prefecture.

 

添削

 

The Ddevelopments1 of hot springs that needs excavateing under the ground more than 1,000 meters deep is are widely actively conducted in Kanagawa Prefecture. However, some the signs2 of depleting being short of deep ground hot spring resources have has already appeared in some a parts of the prefecture.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容のほぼ総てがわかりますがDevelopments of hot springs that excavate under the ground more than 1,000 metersは添削のようにするか、またはThe development that excavates hot springs under the ground ~.とします。

 

1.       The development of hot springsと温泉の開発全体を主語にします。

 

2.       いろいろの兆候があるのでしょうから、some signsとします。

 

添削後の文章

 

The development of hot springs that needs excavating the ground more than 1,000 meters deep is widely conducted in Kanagawa Prefecture. However, some signs of depleting  deep ground hot spring sources have already appeared in some parts of the prefecture.

 

 

読者からの投稿 12(kk, 9 February 08

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, the development of drilling the ground over thousand meters deep for hot springs is now booming. But, the signs of resource depletion have already emerged in some parts of the Prefecture.

 

添削

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, the development of drilling the ground over one thousand meters deep for hot springs is now booming. But, the signs of resource depletion have already emerged in some parts of the Prefecture.

 

コメント

 

内容の総てがわかります。

 

添削後の文章

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, the development of drilling the ground over one thousand meters deep for hot springs is now booming. But, the signs of resource depletion have already emerged in some parts of the Prefecture.

 

 

読者からの投稿 11(dunkel, 14 November 07

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, developing a spa which need to dig more than one thousand meters is booming. But we have already found a serious sign of exhausting water resources in several places of the Prefecture.

 

添削

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, developing a spa which needs to dig the ground more than one thousand meters deep is booming. But we have already seen found a serious signs of the exhausting exhaustion of underground water resources in at several places in of the Pprefecture.

 

コメント

 

英文の内容の大部分はわかりますが、添削のように内容を明確にする語句をいれるとよいでしょう。

 

添削後の文章

 

In Kanagawa Prefecture, developing a spa which needs to dig the ground more than one thousand meters deep is booming. But we have already seen serious signs of the exhaustion of underground water resources at several places in the prefecture.

 

 

読者からの投稿 10(マーチャン、28 August 07

 

Deep hot spring drilling that drills the ground over one thousand meters deep for the development of a hot spring is booming in Kanagawa Prefecture. But there are already signs that deep underground springs are drying up in some parts of the prefecture.

 

添削

 

Deep hot spring dDrilling that drills the ground over one thousand meters deep for the development of a hot spring is booming in Kanagawa Prefecture. But there are already signs that deep underground springs are drying up in some parts of the prefecture1.

 

コメント

 

1.       英文の内容の総てがわかります。内容の重複を整理すると文章がすっきりします。

 

添削後の文章

 

Drilling the ground over one thousand meters deep for the development of a hot spring is booming in Kanagawa Prefecture. But there are already signs that deep underground springs are drying up in some parts of the prefecture.

 

 

読者からの投稿 9(散歩人、17 April 07

 

It is very popular in the Kanagawa Prefecture to dig a deep pit for hot springs. But there are some sign of running out of an underground source of hot springs.

 

添削

 

It is very popular in th